April Sweeps - Day 452

Okay, today (for sure) I need to sit down and record "Two Month Retreat," which is a better title (I think) than "Two Month Itch."

So, I got my COVID test results back, and it looks like I passed.  But now, how will I ever get back all that spit?

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In April: 2966

While driving, I was stopped behind a car, where someone had scrawled "poop" on their back windshield.

Ironically, they did it in toothpaste.

(This is what came up when I did a search for "Irony cartoon")

As of right now, I have zero words written exactly.  A nice round number.

I've spoken (at length) about the challenge of writing teenagers in 2021, when I haven't been one in . . . whoa, eighty-seven years (can that be right?).  

Honestly, I don't even know if kids are allowed to have their cellphones in class or not.  How old does that make me sound, huh?  Because I grew up in a world where teachers were allowed to hit you and we practiced atomic bomb drills in elementary school (not to mention all the rampant speculation as to whether Hawaii or Alaska or Puerto Rico would become state number 49).

(I first posted this in 2020, so I guess it's four years now)

I had to use a word to describe something as dated and uncool, and thirty years ago, I'd have used "hokey" or "lame," but I chose "cheesy" because that was a word I never heard until college (some people even used the hokey and lame term "cheeseball"), and Bossk knows if it's still in use today.  But I just had to go with my gut.

For example, I had a reference to the Weeknd's new song and Tik Tok on the same page, but I still feel a bit like a fraud, like somebody reading will say, "This old f**k has never listened to Save Your Tears--he only knows Blinding Lights, and I'll bet he's never done a Tik Tok video in his life, and has only seen the sexed-up jailbait ones."  

I am a fraud, folks.  I stopped being a teenager around the time the parents of today's teenagers were born.  To put it perspective, when I graduated high school, our guest speaker was Strom Thurmond . . . Junior Senator Strom Thurmond.  

Not only had we not yet landed on the moon . . . the moon had not yet risen.  So, yes, I'm a little bit out of touch.

Push-ups Today: 164
Push-ups In April: 3110

I had passed on working on this particular movie a couple of times before, because they wanted clean-shaven men (and presumably women), and I didn't have any pictures like that to send (I haven't been smooth-faced in I don't know how many years).  But this time, they didn't say anything about it, so I sent in my most recent picture, and when they got back to me, they asked if I would be willing to shave or not.  It would seem that there are no bearded men in the world(s) of this cable network,* but I said I would, and waited until I knew I would be working before I got out the razor.

I saw myself in the mirror three times since the shave, and all three times it was the scene from the Lon Chaney PHANTOM OF THE OPERA.  One of the three times, I thought I saw my Uncle George in the mirror, and one of the times, I could've sworn it was my mother (and not looking a day younger than the last time we hung out).  The third time?  Well, I just muttered, "Who the f**k?"

I'm not saying I hate my face, but if you had a botched boob job by a cosmetic surgeon who went to jail for operating without a license while also tripping on mushrooms . . . how many topless beaches would you attend?  

Anyway, I did get half the story recorded, and the space ran out before I could do more, so I left it there.  It's quite not good, and since it was the story I wrote to please the creepy man on the bridge (it was a dam, actually), I suppose I got off lucky that he let me live.

Or did I?

Words Today: 1080
Words In April: 19,805

*Let's just say it's a channel named after a popular greeting card company.