Stupid Thing of the Week

13 February 2008

Jeff and I met for our weekly luncheon over at Der Wienerschnitzel (or, as he calls it, "The Wiener") today, and afterward, we headed to the store to look for toys (this is also a weekly tradition). In the checkout line, Jeff saw Cosmopolitan magazine there and said a strange word: "va-jay-jay."

"What?" I asked. "Is that the name of the girl on the cover?"

"No." Jeff read the headline aloud. "‘Your Va-jay-jay.' It says it right there."

I thought he was joking, essentially dropping the lowest common denominator a couple extra leagues for a laugh. But I looked at the magazine. And sure enough:
"YOUR VA-JAY-JAY," it said, "Fascinating New Facts About Your Lovely Lady Parts." Somehow neither of us actually opened the magazine to read the article (or even touched it), but we did stare at that headline for the time we had to spare. Jeff thought it might be the yearly sex issue, but I think it would be more accurate to call it the monthly sex issue. The other articles were about how long and often your man pleasures himself, all sorts of neat bedroom tricks everyone knows about but you, why guys cheat, and things Rianna likes to put in her mouth. Yet I can't get over it, so I've got to say it again. "Va-jay-jay."

Okay, I guess I know why they used that word (as opposed to a more recognisable one), but
a) it's kind of gross, and
b) it's really stupid.

Please don't let this catch on. Please, Buffy, I don't ask for a lot.

Rish Outfield

Oh, and here's a bonus addition to the Stupid Thing of the Week. After we left the store and got in Jeff's car, he drove me to Taco Bell. "Dude, how hungry are you?" he asked. I didn't understand the question, since we'd gone to lunch only a half an hour before. But, for reasons I just can't fathom, we went inside and he ordered the ten soft taco special. I'd like to think that it's Va-jay-jay's fault.