Exercise Goal - April

I did NOT set an exercise goal for the month of April (more's the pity), but I do have a goal for the entire year*, so I should've kept posting these.  I did, however, mark the chart every time I went for a run, as a very very small reward for doing it.  So, here's where we stand for the year:

So, I'm about a third of the way there, which isn't bad.  As the weather gets warmer, I do tend to want to go out and do stuff more often, so let's see if I can't get twenty or more days done in May.

*Exercise 200 days in 2023.

Awwdiobook Update 4-30

I actually got two chapters edited today . . . except I found errors in both of them.  Once, I said the wrong word, and the other time, there seemed to be some sort of hiccup in the middle of one of my lines, that sounded like I'd cut something out.  It was just a choice I made, trying to make a character sound exhausted, but it didn't really convey that.  So, no big deal.  I'll redo those two lines, and tomorrow, I'll count it as another completed chapter.

Audiobook Update - 4-29

That terrible dude, that walking filth, that animated bucket of you-know-what, that veritable . . . human scum, Scott Faust contacted me recently, and told me that he found errors in my audiobook of "Not the Same."  I was sad to hear it (but not SUPER sad, after all, he did buy the book*), and fixed the lines, but lamented I wouldn't be able to fix it on Audible without replacing every chapter in their half-convoluted, half-idiotic corrections process.

But then I looked, and they've updated it: Now you can simply upload a new Intro, or Author's Note, or Promo, or simply substitute a chapter without mistakes for the one with errors in it.  It's so simple, it breaks my heart a little to think of all my work out there that still has screw-ups in it.  So, as usual, if you find an error in one of my readings or audiobooks, please let me know, so I can fix it for the next guy. 

 Assuming there is a next guy.

*And you didn't.  Who's the human scum now?

Audiabook Updote 4-28

I did go ahead and re-record the whole darn chapter that was ruined by microphone shortage.  Also, the next chapter had a big chunk where it too went FUBAR.  Sad, but them's the breaks.  I'm still on my way, getting a chapter edited a day.  And if I really wanted this albatross off my back*, I should cut out another four hour block and get a trio of chapters edited, so I could take a day or two off.  But I haven't yet.

*I realize that the ship's called The Cormorant in this one, not The Albatross, but a squab's a squab, man.

Audiobook Update 4-27

Usually, I'm the most timid, submissive, push-overy, nut-less person you've ever seen.  Why, just today, my girlfriend mumbled, "Why do you keep letting those cars go ahead of you?  You've been here longer than them.  What, him too?"  And I didn't know what to say, except, "Honey, you realize I don't have a girlfriend, right?"  And she laughed and said, "That's no surprise to me, you pathetic cuck!" then she laughed and burst into flames like the Maleficent Dragon at Disneyland.

But there's one area in which I'm not a cringing, accommodating, cowering buttplug: and that's when I'm narrating audiobooks.  While doing "Cormorant," there are parts where characters shout orders in British(ish) accents, and I belt them out so loud, the screen goes absolutely blue with sound (and that's with my notoriously quiet audio).  I make no apologies, and only wish I could somehow transfer that uncaring self-righteousness to the rest of my everyday life.

I Join Big In A "Sepia Tone Prison" (Too)

So, over on Big's Anklecast, here's Part Too of Big's story "Sepia Tone Prison," followed by discussion with yours truly.  Check it out HERE.

Audiobook Update 4-26

Turns out, I'm not done after all.  There's a minor short in my microphone cord, and if you kink it just right, there's a hideous overpowering feedback that occurs.  It's happened for a few seconds in, oh, about twelve chapters.  But for some reason, in Chapter 32, the feedback was as persistent as a crackhead Michael Myers.  Nearly the entire chapter was unusable, to the point where I'll just do the whole thing again, except for one page.

Oh, and...

Audiobook Update 4-25

I did that thing I mentioned the other day.  The kids all went somewhere (I think fishing and shopping), and I grabbed the microphone stand (which, for once, is NOT a metaphor), and got them chapters done.

I made it all the way to end, even recording the little bit at the end where Abbie talks about her other work (not sure if she wanted me to or not, but she did it in the third person, so I figured I oughtta), and now only have editing, relines, re-editing, and the end credits left to do.

Audiobook Update 4-24

I'm still in that place where I want to do no work, so I edited another podcast through to the end today.  I won't apologize for it.  But I do need to get back on the horse.  Tomorrow.

Audiobook Update 4-23

I guess I finally hit that point where I can do no more for a while.  Too bad, I was making fairly good time (because I dragged my feet a bit in February, the work on the second half is much more time-pressured than the first).  The last chapter I recorded was fairly short, and I figured I could get it done in twenty minutes or less.  But as I narrated, I made more and more mistakes (and more and more after that), battling my own tongue and my own fatigue.  When I finally made it to the end, I looked at the time, and I'd been at it for more than forty minutes.  Not so good.

What's worse is, I've no doubt I'll have to re-record parts of it.  When I'm that tired, I don't realize when I mumble, or say the wrong word, or simply go silent in the middle of a sentence, and pick up again thirty seconds later.  It would've been better for me to have quit partway through and gone to sleep, then picked up again when I was feeling fresh.

Rish Outcast 249: Not the Same (After That)

Rish talks about his most recently-published novella and audiobook, "Not the Same."  Yep, it's the unidentical twins one.

Brought to you by Dengardaroo Life.

 

To download the episode, just Right-Click HERE.

To support me on Patreon, click HERE.

Logo by Gino "Snot The Aim" Moretto.

Audiobook Update 4-22

My nephew wanted to go fishing today, and they went in the early afternoon, leaving me alone in the house.  Usually, that means full-volume karaoke wearing only a festive Christmas sock . . . but today, I decided that I'd use the time to record some chapters of "Cormorant."  It was the most productive I've been on this thing, getting four chapters done before they came home from fishing.  I would've gone on, too, had they just stayed away...maybe all the way to the end.

Next Street After Cricket Court . . .

Years ago (more than twenty five . . . can it be?), my buddy Jeff moved away from home and got an apartment on Locust Lane, way, way up in the hills.  He sent me his address, and for some reason, "Locust Lane" struck me as particularly spooky, maybe even potentially terrifying.  I vowed to write a story called that one day, and never forgot it, reminding him time and time again that he used to live there.

It's shown up in at least a dozen of my stories, and in the Lara & the Witch novel, she goes to Miller's Fork to live with a family . . . you guessed it, on Locust Lane.

So, it both vexed and pleased me when I walked into the library today and saw this book in their New Release section:

I took a picture of it to share with Jeff.  But hey, I'll share it with you too.  Because, why the heck not?

Audiobook Update 4-21

The editing continues.  In Chapter 27 (of Book 2), a character turns away, "as though to hide whatever spasm of disappointment crossed his face."  I might ask that Spasm of Disappointment be put on my tombstone.    

Audiobook Update - 4/20

I'm averaging just about one and a half chapters a day, here in the home stretch.  Of course, I still have to record the last bit of the book, and when that's done, I'll be able to focus just on editing, so I'm pretty sure I'll make it.

Audiobook Update 4/19

I've been thinking about what I can do to celebrate when I finish this audiobook*, some kind of tasty treat or extravagance (when I reached the one-half mark, I bought an overpriced knock-off Transformer--Galvatron, like I had as a kid).  And I was thinking of going to the all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet where I only go with Jeff, or the all-you-can-eat pizza buffet, where I go with no one.  It's fun to dream.

*Remember that on the last one (boy, that feels like two months back, instead of more than half a year, like it actually was), I bought one of those delicious-but-expensive energy drinks, as a special reward for myself, and it was gone when I went into my cupboard to retrieve it?  That still upsets me, way more than $2.25 plus tax ever should.

Audiobook Update 4-18

 So, in editing you discover (meaning, I discover) that there are mistakes you had no idea were mistakes during the recording.  For example, there are two main G characters and two main S characters in "Cormorant," and in one chapter, I gave Silas Silveo's voice, and in another, I gave Gwain Gerard's voice.

Oh, and even stranger, in one chapter, I gave Silveo Gerard's voice, for some reason.

Worst of all, there are a couple of these lines that I missed completely, only for Abbie to catch them when I'd sent them her way.  Still, they're pretty easy to fix.  And the progress continues.

Big Toy Show

So, on Saturday, there was a big toy show, the biggest one of the year (although they're talking about doing it again at the end of the year, because it got such a turnout), held in a parking lot downtown.  And this was the first time I went as a seller instead of a buyer.  

It was a very interesting experience, despite my horrible sunburn.  The question is: Would it be an interesting experience for the listeners of my podcast?

Also, I got the first of the last twenty chapters done.  Yay.

Audiobook - The Twenty Eventee

Holy monkey, we're down to twenty chapters left in "The Cormorant."  I can't say I never expected to make it to this, since last week I made the world's saddest pie chart with 26 segments in it (to mark off daily on my blog), and when I counted them . . . it was only twenty.  So, I'm going to mark off each of these segments as I finish each chapter, and post them here.  

Wish me luck . . . it doesn't have to be good.

I Perform "Who Built The Moon?" On Tales To Terrify

Every once in a while, other podcasts will still ask me to do a story for them.  And I'm usually pretty happy to do it*, since I like to narrate stories, and they're usually pretty good ones.  Recently, "Tales To Terrify" asked me to perform "Who Built The Moon?" by Tyler Jones.

Four buddies are on a hunting trip to Canada when something mysterious and/or terrible happens.  What happened to John and his girlfriend out in the woods?  And what is out there now?**

Every story or character or audiobook presents its own challenges.  This one was quite long, with lots of shouting.  Check it out HERE . . . if you dare.

*There was one a year or two back that was so incompetently run that they asked me to do relines eight months after I sent them the story, then had the temerity to complain that the new lines didn't match the old ones.  If I can remember which publication they worked for, I'd vow not to work for them again.  But I can't.

**I bet you can't predict the answer.  Because I've read it thrice now, and I frankly don't know.

Rish Outcast 248: Never Let Him Go 2

So, here is the second half of the Dead & Breakfast story "Never Let Him Go."  Mrs. Bice is eager to be rid of Mason Bradley, but someone else has other plans for him.

To download the episode, just Right-Click HERE.

To support me on Patreon, click HERE.

Logo by Gino "Never Say Never Let Him Go Again" Moretto.

Audiobook Update

As I (slowly) approach the home stretch of my work on Abigail Hilton's "The Cormorant," I have grown to hate (above all things) the sounds my mouth makes as I speak.  There are, no exaggeration, at least a obnoxious hundred mouth sounds in every single chapter.  Are these new?  Is it something my voice does as I approach old age?  Have they been present in every previous audiobook and I've never noticed them before?  

I mean, I make it hard on myself anyway with all the line readings, retakes, chair farts, accent experimentation, and genuine eff-ups each time I sit down to record.  But the mouth sounds . . . that's not like saying "Gerald" instead of "Gerard" or reading a Silveo line in Silas's voice.  That shite is some dark, subtle, Lovecraftian evil.  

Every day, though, I chip away at this iceberg, and am trying to get at least one chapter done daily.  By my math, I've got thirty-two episodes left to edit.  And twenty-six days to get them done in.  

You know, this might be my last audiobook this year.

My Book "Not the Same" Available on Audible

So, I've got another audiobook out there, this one "Not the Same," written and narrated by me.

This is the story I wrote about the identical twin sisters, Layla and Shayla, who spend every day together.  But when Shayla goes on a school trip, separating them for a weekend, she comes back . . . somehow changed.  Nobody else seems to see it.  Is it just in Shayla's mind?

No, of course it isn't.  Jeez.

Anyhow, I'll be doing an episode of the Outcast for it (I recorded the fugger back in January--these things take time), but for now, you can check it out RIGHT HERE.

My Voice in "Cacophony" on HorrorAddicts

"R. Outfield puts the 'phony' back in Cacophony!"

--Associated Press

So, last year, Emerian over at the HorrorAddicts podcast had me voice a bunch of male characters on various audio dramas on her show (if you recall, she is somehow able to get out a long podcast, brimming with new content every week or so), and it looks like this year will be no different.

I lend my "talents" to Judith Pancoast's story "Cacophony."  I voice Bob, the douchey husband.  As you do.  Check it out HERE.

Marshal and I Talk About the Return of the Mandalorian

Well, I'm as surprised about this as anyone.  After several months without an episode, Marshal Latham and I got together to talk about "The Mandalorian" for the Delusions of Grandeur podcast.

We're onto Season 3 now (the first three episodes, anyway), and we talk all about it HERE.

Rish Outcast 247: Never Let Him Go 1

In an episode (mostly) from 2020, Rish presents the "Dead & Breakfast" story "Never Let Him Go."  Or, the first half anyway.

Brought to you by Dengardaroo Life.

Note: A lot of times, I will include extra bits in the episode for my Patreon supporters . . . in this one, I went ahead and released the Patreon version for you too.  You're welcome.

To download the episode, simply Right-Click HERE.

To support me on Patreon, click HERE.

Logo by Gino "Forever Let Him Go" Moretto.

Exthorcise Update

 Here we are in another month.  Good luck in yours.