Sometimes a cellular peptide cake is just . . .

I rented a DVD of a classic English Hitchcock film the other day, and while I quite enjoyed it, I found myself wondering about its making and influence. Luckily, there was an audio commentary done by a film historian, so I stuck it on, looking for a little enlightenment.

But what I got was something akin to a feature-length college thesis read aloud, discussing the Freudian undercurrents of the film.

Time and time again, the commentator talked about the secret sexual relevence of scenes, lines, and props in the film. "Note the candlestick on the far left," she said, "An obvious phallic symbol." "Ashcroft brandishes a phallic knife," she says later, then "The professor pokes at Hannay with his finger, its phallic intent inarguable." After the third time, I began screaming incoherently everytime the commentator mentioned that a train controller or telephone reciever or exclamation point was a phallic symbol, to the extent that three orderlies came into the room and medicated me in turn.

The first time I ever heard the phrase "phallic symbol" in my sheltered upbringing was when a McDonalds manager explained the blatant phallus in the poster for THE LITTLE MERMAID.

I quite enjoyed my Philosophy classes in school, but I don't believe that every banana is a dong. Listening to the commentary, I'm starting to believe in penis envy, however.

Rish "Notice The Crescent Moon In The Sky, An Obvious Phallic Symbol" Outfield