Thursday, September 02, 2010

A bit of culture

In other news, I wanted to see PIRANHA 3-D when it came out, but no one would go with me. Finally, on Monday I decided I would go see it by myself, crying in my popcorn, and comment to the invisible ghost of Traysi the Plasma Girl if anything amused me. I told Jeff about my plans, and he made me an offer.

You see, he had been dying to see THE GIRL WHO PLAYED WITH FIRE in the theatre, but after he dragged his wife, kicking and shrieking, to THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO, she took the children away and got a restraining order on her (now former) husband. Jeff asked me maybe seven or eight times if I would go with him, but I always had plans with Traysi's invisible ghost.

So, Jeff's proposal was that, if he went to see PIRANHA 3-D with me on Tuesday, would I go see FLICKAN SOM LEKTE MED ELDEN with him on Wednesday?

I had to think about it. There's something about being dragged (kicking and shrieking) to see a movie in Swedish that truly frightens and intimidates me. Plus, I hadn't seen the original. Plus, I didn't want to.

But he really hates 3-D, as much as I hate that Progressive Insurance woman. And sure enough, he was there with bells on to see the CG fish eating boobies movie with me. I was worried, on the drive over, that PIRANHA wouldn't be very good, and then I'd be stuck seeing Jeff's movie with him, and started plotting a way to avoid seeing Jeff's movie altogether.

I didn't succeed.

I don't like feeling left out, so I tried to get ambitious and watch GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO before we left, not realizing I could just stream it from NetFlix, so I ended up seeing about 89% of it before Jeff arrived to cart me off. He an hour away from his house to see this movie, so I should've known there was no dissuading him (he had also read all the books in preparation for this auspicious day).

We drove up there, and he told me a bit about the books, and went to the arthouse theater I've always found to be a bit skeevy for some reason. We were the only ones in the room, but right before it started, I think two or four others joined us.

I've always had a problem with subtitles and foreign names (and cultures). Their names (and sometimes their faces, sorry) all seem the same to me. But to be honest, these two movies were pretty straightforward and understandable, and the culture was Western enough that I never had to ask, "If she's a widow, then why can't she be seen shaking hands with that unmarried man on a Qwynsday afternoon again?"

If you're like me, then you probably know what I'm talking about. And if you're not like me, then feel free to mock me, but I often find it hard to relate to the characters and situations in foreign films, since their language and mannerisms and entire frame of reference strikes me as so alien. Plus, I'm a dialogue guy, and if I can't pronounce it or remember it, I can't quote it back later.

Plus, I'm the devil.

The movie was well-made, and as the second part of a Trilogy, ended with some plotlines still to be resolved, but also tried to satisfy on its own, which I find to be quite a difficult accomplishment.

Jeff liked it a great deal, and seemed almost desperate that I vow to come see THE GIRL WHO KICKED THE HORNET'S NEST when it comes out in a few . . . minutes. We got dinner and talked about the movie, then drove the loooooooooong way home, just, I suspect, so Jeff could have a bit more of a night out.

He's a good guy, even if he is more machine now than man, twisted and evil.

I need to get more culture. I used to want to go places and speak many languages, and lately I've just been stagnating, allowing my ambitions to scatter like cockroaches when the light's switched on. So, it was good for me to see these films, and justifiable for Jeff to force me like he did.

And despite myself, I think I ended up enjoying the two Swedish flicks more than I did PIRANHA. I'm not sure how that could have happened.

Just don't let Jeff know.

Rish Teleborian Outfield

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