Friday, November 26, 2010

Where You Eat

At work today I met a lovely new employee, cute as the night is long, but with one of those ugly first names that you can't really imagine a pretty girl having (plus, it's the last name of one of my friends, so that's even worse). But I took a shine to her immediately, and even though I know sod-all about women, I interacted with her as much as humanly possible during my endless shift today.

At lunch, we happened to both be in the breakroom at the same time (either by coincidence, or by way of me somehow arranging for my sister to bring me food twenty-five minutes after my scheduled lunch time so that we'd end up in there together), and I chatted her up a bit more, while I could. There were a couple other dudes in there at the same time (including the guy with the atrocious Boston accent, who's she's probably sleeping with as I type this), and I thought all of us were conversing pleasantly and innocuously.

After the new girl got up to go back to work, one of the dudes (not the accented one) put his hand on my shoulder and said, "Don't shit where you eat, man."

I thought that was pretty funny because:
A) I'd never met this guy before this week,
2) The phrase has always been vulgarly hilarious to me,
and C) Because he picked up on my obviously un-subtle interest.

Anyway, just thought I'd mention it.


Abigail Hilton said...

AKA, "Never date someone it would be extremely inconvenient to break up with."

And the closely related, "Never date someone it would be catastrophic to break up with."

Not necessarily awful advice, but it sounds a lot like, "Plan the break-up before you date" or worse,
"Never date anyone who shares your life or with whom you have anything in common."

Which is just stupid. I say go for it.

Big Anklevich said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Big Anklevich said...

That could possibly be good advice, but how long do you expect to be eating at that particular table? And on top of that, she's likely just as temporary or more so, right?

I say shit all over it.

Rish Outfield said...

Gross, dude.