May Sweeps - Day 469

I'm at the library again.  It closes in almost one hour (fifty-something minutes).  My goal is to a) write at least five hundred words, and b) to stop farting.

So last night, I went ahead and recorded "Everybody Poops" in the voice of (Fake) Morgan Freeman.  I'd say it's up there alongside the worst things I have EVER done.*  I can't say why I did it, your honor, only that, were I to go back in time, I'd not do it again, I swear.

Except . . . I went to Target the other day, and I saw this book on their shelf:

And I thought, "Wouldn't that be fun read in the voice of Jimmy Stewart or Al Pacino?"

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In May: 1516

I continue my search for a cover-appropriate silhouettes on the Unsplash website.  Today's photo is this one:

Gosh, I love images like this.  They're so simple, yet so evocative.  It makes me think of PSYCHO, and maybe made you think of TITANIC, but it would work great for a horror story cover.  Just not the one I'm trying to find an image for.  And crap, I realize I've been writing about this particular cover art since April 7th.

And that reminds me, I did ask Gino to do me an image for my story "Dying Is Easy," the other day, and sent him my own sketch for what I wanted.  This is what I managed, and the poor Kiwi bastage has already wasted far too long trying to make a presentable version of it.  Whatever the Unified Wellington School District is paying the guy, it ain't enough.

I'll keep you updated.  After all, I gotta have stuff to blog about every single day.  Ugh.

And the library kicked everybody out.  But, I had managed 619 words, so I consider one of my above two goals achieved.

Sometimes I will get random friend requests on Facebook, from people I don't know, or worse, hot Eastern European model types that I sense are not who they say they are.  Often, I would accept their requests sight unseen, since I have/had a podcast that strangers listened to.

In 2016, I got a request from another one with a funny name and I accepted.  He immediately sent me the message "hello  how r u" with no punctuation.  A month later, he sent "how r u" again.  I didn't reply because, well, I guess I deserve to be alone.  In 2019, I got another message, this one an emoticon of a hand waving, with the message "Gwazo is waving at you."  I ignored it, but a few months later, he sent the message "Don't kill her" to me.

Now, I have no idea what he meant by this (whether it was some odd spam, madness, or a genuine attempt to get through to me before I degenerate further), but I actually responded to this one, typing back, "Alright.  But I would've gotten away with it this time."

I also have little clue what he/it thought of that, except that it took him three months to reply with "my friend."  Warms your heart, don't it?

Push-ups Today: 170
Push-ups In May: 1724

Today I did something I've only done once or twice before, since this whole thing started (the first time was on Valentine's Day, so it's easy to see why): I went on TWO runs.  It was about eleven o'clock, and I was going to watch "Saturday Night Live," but first I did some push-ups, and then I thought, "Why not run again?  After all, my clothes already stink from the first one."  

So I did.  No reason.

Lastly. I was looking at an article about the Israel/Hamas conflict going on in Gaza right now, and while I was reading about the number of women and children dead (nearly a hundred), I saw that people on the internet are still whinging about Karen Gillan's (glorious) outfit in JUMANJI: WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE.

To which, I post both Captain Picard AND Commander Riker facepalms:

Thank you, sirs.

 

Words Today: 667 (shoot, over by one)
Words In May: 8551

*I guess it would rate right below letting a stranger bleed to death outside my Los Angeles apartment, and right above carving the f-word into a car with my keys in 1991.  Your mileage may vary, though.