December Sweeps - Day 690

I only have a half hour to write today, much less blog.  I often ask my nephews if they'd like to come to the library with me, and invariably, they tell me "Nope," or on generous days, "No thanks."  But for some reason, the fourteen year old said he'd come with me today, so we loaded into the car and jetted over here less than an hour before closing.  I sat here writing on my Outpost story while he watched "Fudgin' Grey's Anatomy" on his phone.  But ah well.

Sometimes, I imagine working at the library would be a good job, since I never see any of them doing anything other than sit at a desk on a computer, waiting for someone to ask for help finding a book logging into the system or letting them into the women's restroom.

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 2211

Push-ups Today: 100
Push-ups In December: 2245

Words Today: 681
Words In December: 13,175

December Sweeps - Day 689

I haven't had any opportunities to read books the last . . . jeez, almost two weeks now.  But today, I opened the book I got from the library and tried to read it . . . and I didn't recognize any of the characters' names or recall exactly what was going on (I was still in Chapter One, so I guess it's forgivable).  I had an audiobook in the car, though, that I'd been listening to since November, a Suzanne Collins book, and I was enjoying it, but it was way too long, and I realized that I still had multiple discs left, even though I was tiring of it.  I kept on, but realized it was a joy-free drudgery, so I gave up, despite having invested several hours in it.  

I went to the library and wanted something short I could finish in a couple of weeks and not have to renew or pay late fees on.  I saw an audiobook of Stephen King's "Carrie," narrated by Sissy Spacek, and scooped it up.

A day later, I'm supremely happy with it, astounded that the book can be so moving and brilliantly alive, despite me never being a huge fan of it (I found a first edition hardcover of it one time--without a dust jacket--and I think I gave to my niece for her birthday a couple of years ago).

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 2111

Okay, I'm going to blog for ten minutes (I haven't updated my detested blog in a while, despite nearly two years of it), and then write for thirty or so.  I think I mentioned that Friday I was feeling very stressed and unhappy, but today was the opposite.  I just don't feel bad at all, and have smiled at strangers everywhere I went today.  Maybe it's the Christmas spirit, who knows?

I did write, for about forty minutes.  Didn't get a lot done, but the story is inching along.  I have no deadline but whatever I set for myself.

Push-ups Today: 100
Push-ups In December: 2145

My cousin and I watched a handful of "Seinfeld" episodes as we waited for the final "Hawkeye" to air.  I know I go on and on about Jason Alexander's immense talent on that show, but I don't know if I've ever mentioned what a treasure Jerry Stiller was (he played George's apoplectic father).  I love how he's like a volcano ready to explode, for virtually no reason, and hope to be a real-life Frank Costanza one day.

We finished "Hawkeye," and I'm sad it had to end after only six episodes.  The finale wasn't as shit as the "Loki" one was, but I was still disappointed (I was under the impression they introduced Kingpin, only to kill him in the same episode, but a bunch of folks online said the same thing happened in the comics, and he got better.  So there's that).*

Words Today: 833
Words In December: 

*Also, I wondered why on Earth he had a red Hawaiian shirt on under his white suit, but that was apparently right out of the comics.

November Sweeps - Day 688

My nephew (the now-fourteen year old) finished watching all seventeen seasons of "Grey's Anatomy," and then moved on to something called "Private Practice," which is apparently a spin-off that's gone, holy shit, six seasons of its own.  The lil bastard watches five or six episodes a day (on schooldays) and more the rest of the time, and I berated him for it once again.  Why would he watch something that I hate when he's never watched any of the Disney+ Marvel shows?  

So, he said he would watch the first episode of "Hawkeye" with me this afternoon.  I was happy to watch it again, and it was over quickly, with plenty of time to get work done and go to the library after.  But then we went on to the second episode, and watched that through, and that was fine too, but I was a bit rushed now to get my work AND get a library visit in.  But my nephew hit Skip, and the third episode started up.  I told him, "Hey, this is the last one, okay?  We'll watch the first three, and then on Thursday or Friday, we'll watch the second three."  I would have very little time to write and get my work done, but I could make do. 

Unfortunately, when the third episode ended, he hit Skip to start watching the fourth.  I told him I couldn't, got up, and turned the TV off.  I went to my room, looked at my to-do list, and heard the TV in the living room come back on.  He had started watching "Hawkeye" without me.  Well, that couldn't stand, so I went back out there and said, "No more episodes, I can't watch with you."  He said, "So?  I'll just watch it by myself."  It bummed me out, so I sat on the couch for a minute before getting my work done.  A half hour later, the episode was over, and I hadn't moved.  Now, there was only time to get my work done OR go to the library.  And my nephew Skipped to the fifth and final episode.  I grumbled, but stayed put.  When that episode ended, I threw my coat on and drove over to the library with less than an hour to spare.

And now, I've spent ten minutes blogging.  Sigh.

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 2011

I typed about four hundred words, and that's good an all, but I misspelled the word "position" just now, and couldn't figure out how I'd gotten it wrong ("positition"), then got it in my head to look up the old video game Pole Position on Wikipedia . . . for no reason whatsoever.  It became this thing in my mind that I absolutely HAD to do, I can't explain it.  I think my more religious relatives might say that it was the Devil whispering in my ear, tempting me away from what is right (would Devil be capitalized?  It's a title, right?), but why would Beelzebub* want me not to write, or to care about Pole Position, a game I haven't thought about in, what, thirty years?

I also wrote a couple of paragraphs on "Hatchling" before I recorded, which was smart because it didn't eat up any audio space.

Push-ups Today: 111
Push-ups In December: 2045

I took my mom to the doctor's office today, and they did all sorts of memory tests on her.  It was rather fascinating, although I felt bad that she struggled with them, although she didn't technically fail any.  I think I'll talk about it in my Patreon address next week, since it was so strange.

Words Today: 949
Words In December: 12,494

*He lets me call him "Bill."

November Sweeps - Day 687

I still haven't sent Big Anklevich a Christmas present this year.  I've got a box filled with junk--er, treasures that I keep meaning to send, but I couldn't think of anything to send him other than dung.

But I have a lot of Jurassic World dinosaurs lying around, and thought he might like one for his Christmas display.

I grabbed a Metriacanthosaurus, because I had two.

Then I painted it white.

Then I took the green and painted that sky blue.  In my mind, I thought it would seem like a holiday or ice dinosaur.

And here's the finished product:

Hopefully, it fits in with his other Christmas toys.

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 1911

Push-ups Today: 100
Push-ups In December: 1934

I very nearly finished recording Abbie's book today.  Only one more chapter and the copyright info, then it's all on to editing.  She sometimes shares fan art that she receives from the series, which is frankly pretty awesome.  I suppose I will have made it when people start sending me drawings of bice aliens, Old Widow Holcomb, or the ghosts at Noble Oaks Bed & Breakfast.

Words Today: 211
Words In December: 11,545

November Sweeps - Day 686

We had our family Christmas party today.  It was good to see the people there, and everyone got along.  I shared a story I wrote at the end of the activity, then everyone went their separate ways.  My brother-in-law's kid brought his girlfriend, and she was so cool, I'm still puzzling about it.  I got a holiday snowglobe as my white elephant gift, but it says 2021 on it, so it's not really possible to re-gift it to somebody else.*  

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 1811

Push-ups Today: 100
Push-ups In December: 1834

One of my goals for 2021 was to put out another audio collection (and a Christmas one, but I only work on those around the holidays).  I haven't really worked on them, despite my best intentions.  But Gino sent me another cover for one, which ought to give the me the impetus for working on the darn thing . . . despite the title.

I dig it, and now I ought to get off my duff and published another collection.  Thanks, Gino!

Words Today: 335
Words In December: 11,334

*Unless there's a snowglobe with the Death Star in it, and instead of snow, little TIE Fighters and X-wings float around it, I'm not in need of one.

November Sweeps - Day 685

So, I was stressing out quite a bit this morning.  Not sure why, but I was feeling it.  Now, I'm at the library a few hours later, and I'm more calm about things. 

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 1711

So, I've got a story presentation at tomorrow's Christmas party, and the thing that had me so stressed was that I got it into my head that, since I had to write the story anyway, I could use it for the Christmas episode of my podcast next week.  But I talked to other people who said it didn't have to be a masterpiece or anything.

So, I sat down at the library and started writing it.  I got about six hundred words (okay, slightly more than that):

And I was thinking, I could write a short version and a long version, and the short one I'll read at the party, and the long version, I'll read in Hell.  It seemed like a good plan to me.

Of course, before I got to seven hundred words, the screen went blue and I got a message saying that there was an error and the computer had to restart.*  So, the computer restarted, and everything was lost.

Big, so predictable the Germans could set their watches by it, told me this was what I get for not using Googledocs. 

So, I guess I'm going to start again now.  But this time, I'm writing the story in an email window.

I wrote out the long version, including everything, which came to 1436 words, then I hacked and slashed it, finally deciding to be finished with a three page 899 word story.

And weirdly, now I feel calm, and am not even all that upset about the crashing computer earlier (now that everything's saved, I guess I mean).

It's pretty rare that I write a story (even a short one) in a single day, so technically, I started it yesterday and finished it today.  But I'll take the win.

Push-ups Today: 100
Push-ups In December: 1734

We saw SPIDER-MAN: NO WAY HOME tonight.  I got tickets for my nephew and my cousin and me about two weeks ago (there was buzz that the showings would actually sell out, despite the world we now live in).  My cousin ended up bringing his fifteen year old daughter and her friend at the last minute, and they sat all the way in the back, but we could hear them coo-ing and squealing and cheering throughout.

The movie was quite good.  I liked it a great deal--especially the ending--but wasn't quite as moved by anything in it as I had been with Clint Barton trying to talk to his son on the phone when he couldn't hear him.  But hey, you do you.

Words Today: 1495
Words In December:10,999

*This happened a bit more than a year ago, and was the reason I stopped using their computers.

December Sweeps - Day 684

My mom reminded me today that I had a white elephant story on Saturday.  I didn't know what that meant, and first thought she was telling me this before I picked my nephew up from preschool because I was supposed to take a white elephant gift, or tell a story about one I had gotten.

But no, I'm in charge this year of telling a story while people pass their wrapped gifts in a circle, and when the story ends, whichever gift ends up with which person is who they're stuck with.

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 1611

Tonight, Cathexis and I went to a holiday musical.

I first took my niece to a play several years ago (when she was eight or nine), and we've gone to many since then.  I usually mention when I see somebody is performing one we might like, but we only end up going to half of those.  This time, I told her I'd just buy her the ticket as her Christmas gift, and we ended up meeting at the theater, which used to be a movie theater years ago (it was where I first saw BACK TO THE FUTURE back in '85).

It was a Christmas play, quite inoffensive and mildly amusing and entertaining.  A couple of the actors were quite good, being both able to sing and act, while a couple others were only able to do one of those things. 

Push-ups Today: 100
Push-ups In December: 1634

The play, it turned out, was an original, written and directed by one of the stars.  I had wished that I had known that going in, because I would've been far kinder to it in my mind.  It wasn't until the intermission that I discovered it was homegrown, and that made me admire it, at least a little.  Who knows, after revising and rewriting it, it may make a fortune for the young playwright, but who knows how many amateur productions go on to reasonable success?

Words: 641
Words In December: 9504

November Sweeps - Day 683

I woke up when my alarm went off (well, I had awakened a couple of times before then, unsure of my surroundings, but one thing I can say for my cousin's basement is that he keeps all the windows securely covered, so it was pretty dark even with the sun shining down on all that blinding snow.

Everything looked white and beautiful outside, with over a foot of new snow.  The weight of the snow on the branches of his trees and caused a limb to snap off, and I snapped a photo of the family van, with, jeez, fourteen or fifteen inches of snow on it:

Around ten am, my cousin went outside to attempt to shovel a path wherein we could drive (him to work, and me home).  He has a neat new snowblower that shoots snow into the air, and you can angle the spray however you want it (which was fun to watch, but the novelty would surely wear off after the second time you had to use it).

I followed my cousin around for half an hour, shoveling snow by hand while he pushed the snowblower around.  Other neighbors were outside, pushing shovels or running their own blowers.  None of them seemed to think it was the end of the world, although my cousin's kids had no way of getting to school, so he let them stay at home (if he had owned a monster truck, sure, they could've made it to the bus stop, or school itself, but hey).

This is a Nativity display in a front yard . . . somewhere.

Sit-ups Today: 111
Sit-ups In December: 1511

Push-ups Today: 111
Push-ups In December: 1534

As far as writing goes, I wrote 67 words on one project, then opened the Outpost story and wrote 333 on it before the library made its unwelcome "We will be closing in ten minutes, please save your work" announcement.  333 is a nice round number, and added to 67, is fairly even too.  Guess I'll take off now.

Words Today: 400
Words In December: 8863

December Sweeps - Day 682

Another day, another pointless trip to the library.  

Unfortunately, when I went to send my daily words to myself . . . the internet went down.  I didn't know how long it would be before it came back, except that I had to leave (and even if I didn't, the library would be closing in ten minutes or so, and I'd lose everything anyway).  I tried to open Gmail in a new window, but nothing would come up.  And I couldn't even check my Drafts to see if what I'd written was saved or not.

So I did the only thing I could think of doing: I took two photos of all the words I had written, knowing that I could type them again if I lost everything.  Then I logged off the system and took off.

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 1400

After "Hawkeye," it was time to head home, but as we went outside, we were surprised to see more snow than we ever would have expected to have piled up in the three hours we'd hung out.  It was over a foot, piled up on my car and all around it, mostly stopped, but with enough falling that I had to scrape my windshield again once I'd gotten around the car.  

I was able to back down the driveway, but once I hit the snow in the cul-de-sac, I was stuck.  My poor cousin, still wearing shorts for some maniacal reason, had to come out and try to push me, but the engine wouldn't even rev with the wheels not making contact with the ground.  It was weird.

The thing is, I had never seen over a foot of snow fall in the time it took to watch three "Seinfeld"s and a "Hawkeye."  So even if I had been able to make it out of his neighborhood, the town roads and the freeway might have been absolutely deadly (and I never relish the thought of slowly trundling up the freeway only to have big semi trucks zoom by me going seventy, throwing up walls of blinding grey slush.  Do you?).

So, he pushed me enough that I could get back onto his driveway, and we trudged back into the house, him for his bed, and me for his downstairs couch.  

Push-ups Today: 100
Push-ups In December: 1423

Words Today: 277 
Words In December: 8463

December Sweeps - Day 681

Every once in a while, one of the packages I send gets returned to me.  Almost without fail, I am unhappy to see it.  Today was strange, though.  I hadn't heard from the buyer that there was anything wrong (or that the item hadn't arrived), but there it was in my mailbox with a Return To Sender sticker from the post office on it.  But someone had written "WTF" on the front of it in blue pen.  That was a first.

W.T.F. indeed.

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 1300

I finally got Big to sit down and record a sketch with me for the podcast, and you know . . . it wasn't any good.  Thank Bossk we hadn't managed to get Renee on the line with us as well.

It reminds me of when I went to see FATHER'S DAY in '97.  I was so excited, "Wow, Robin Williams, Billy Crystal, and Julia Louis-Dreyfuss in a movie together!  And directed by Ivan Reitman?  How could it go wrong?"

Well, it did.  Very wrong.  And why is still a mystery to me, after all these years.

Push-ups Today: 100
Push-ups In December: 1323

It's Monday, and I hit the library again tonight.  One day, I promise you, I will look back at the time right now and miss it.  I guess I miss how I was last year, so excited about exercise and writing and the possibilities of change.  Seems like a while ago, and no time at all.

I wrote a very little section on my story, bringing the total to 34,404 words.  I know what you're saying, couldn't you have managed forty more words?  And you know what, you OCD devil, you're right.

Words Today: 805
Words In December: 8186

December Sweeps - Day 680

Oh, regarding yesterday's post.  Someone informed me that a "palindrome" is not the filthy, illegal sexual act that I thought it was, but merely a word that reads the same frontwards and backwards, like "Hannah," "kayak," "racecar," and "buntcake."  I'm sorry about the misunderstanding.

I REALLY ought to go on a hike today.  I asked Big to encourage me, and he said, "You can do it!" in Rob Schneider's voice.  And that's hard to ignore.

Sit-ups Today: 100
Sit-ups In December: 1200

Wow, the hike was rough.  But hey, I did it, and am a stronger person for it.  Or not. 

It was a fairly warm winter day, at least compared to when it was snowing or freezing, so I jumped in the car, sans coat or gloves, and headed to the base of the mountain as fast as I could manage.

There was snow on the ground, all the way up the trail.  In other words, a mile hike up the mountain in snow.  Right as I started up, I passed a man on crutches coming down.  Not only did he have crutches, but he had a service dog with him (the dog jumped up on me twice).  The crutches guy said, "You going up there now?  It's gonna be dark soon."  "I'll be alright," I said, "since the snow will reflect the light."  "Yeah, but you're going up by yourself, without a coat?  Do you at least have spikes on your shoes?"  "No," I said, "but if you . . ."

I didn't dare complete the statement.  If you, a guy on frickin' crutches, could do it, then I should be able to too."  "I'll be okay," I said.  "Thoughts and prayers, man," the stranger said, and hobbled back down the trail.

Push-ups Today: 100
Push-ups In December: 1223

I had given myself more time in December to get to the top of the trail than I had in November, but I hadn't counted on the terrain being much, much more difficult.  I'd loaded an audiobook on my phone to listen to, a self-help book I'd wanted to read for a long time.  But it did make me feel kind of bad instead of good (I probably should've listened to music instead).  I trudged up the hill, and when I passed the first sign (the one that tells you how far you've gone versus how far there is left to go), I realized I wasn't going to make it.  Pretty soon, my shoes would be soaked, then my socks, and my hands and ears would be cold, and I was going so slowly it would be dark before I was even halfway up.

Some hikers came down, but not many.  There weren't even a pair of horny twenty-somethings watching the sunset and pawing one another atop the big rock at the one-third point.

Behind me, I saw a couple walking up the hill, much faster than me, and I tried--I really tried--to go faster, so they wouldn't pass me by, but around the next bend, I just walked out into the snow so they could go around me.  The man zoomed on by, going so fast, you'd think there wasn't any snow (or even an incline).  But his wife stopped and looked at me.  And I knew her.  I had gone to high school with her and we'd been friends.

Strangely, she told her husband to keep on going, and she walked up the hill with me, keeping my snail's pace instead of trying to match her husband's practical sprint.  We talked, and before too long, we were at the top (where the husband was already ready to turn around and head back down).  I was pretty sweaty, having exerted myself to get up there, but this was where you could sit down:

The two of them took off, leaving me the only person left on the mountain.  Now it was dark, but I drank my water, and started down.  I was in no hurry, and the one time I tried to go fast was the one time I slipped and fell, my hand catching me by plunging through the snow, which--big shock--was cold.  Very slowly, and not-at-all sure-footedly, I made my way down the trail, all by myself, but what else is new?  I did imagine encountering a slavering wolf or a yeti on my hike down in the dark, but that would be far too entertaining for this blog.

Words Today: 914
Words In December: 7381