My Voice on "Fallen Angel" by Campfire Radio Theater

I have been known to complain when a particular podcast makes its (according to me) irritatingly unreasonable demands on me, but one podcast I've never been unhappy to work on is Campfire Radio Theater.  John Ballentine's audio dramas are, no exaggeration, the highest-quality productions I get to be a part of.*

When an online investigative journalist is approached about a mysterious object being kept under wraps by the government, she is surprised to find something truly otherworldly, not to mention dangerous.  For her.

I voice General Randall (Character Voice 2 in my list of three), but maybe one day, I'll get to be the lead in one of these again.  Vegas odds say no, though.

Check it out HERE.

*Perhaps that's why they never come to me anymore.  There may be folks out there who can do a dozen voices and accents, instead of my usual three.

A Case of Silver Screen Syndrome

One of the podcast anthologies that asks me to do narrations for them--the last one being the unfortunately-located "The Cat That Went To Uranus"--is Cast of Wonders.

Recently, they had me narrate "Silver Screen Syndrome" by Mia Xuan.  The father of the narrator is suffering from an uncommon mental (or physical?) disorder wherein he only comes alive and alert when cameras are on him, to increasingly diminishing results.

It's one of those Science Fiction stories that is clearly about Something Else, but cloaked in the fantastic so as to make the subject more palatable to a 1950s audience.  Having to be around someone you love when their mind is deteriorating has got to be difficult, and I can imagine the writer of this story dealing with that by creating a malady that's distant from reality, yet just as baffling and/or frustrating as the real thing.

The story is extremely short, and yet it had half a dozen words in it I did not know how to pronounce, which is pretty rare nowadays.  I did the best I could with it*, but whether my performance is affective (or affecting) or not really depends on the listener.  Find out for yourself HERE.

*And that ain't nothin.  But still.

When I See You Smile

 My buddy Jonathan Wilson*, months ago, asked me for a couple of my readings of public domain stories that he could run on his YouTube channel, and he's put another one up.

"The Dead Smile" by F. Marion Crawford tells of the evil Hugh Ockram, who, despite being dead, still manages to ruin the lives of his son Gabriel and the woman he loves.  

I really ought to see if I can find another story by him--I spent an hour on Sunday reading a story by a much higher-profile author that ended so badly I just deleted the whole thing--but in the meantime, check it out HERE.

*Is that okay to say?  Is he my buddy?  Would he lend me ten dollars in a pinch?

My Voice In "Manor Of Frights" Collection

I often mention it when I narrate or lend my voice to a story on other podcasts, but I suppose I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that Emerian Rich has recently put out a collection of stories that she performed on the HorrorAddicts podcast, many of which feature my voice as well.

The collection includes (at least as far as I can tell) seventeen stories, each taking place in a room of a macabre Victorian manor, and are as follows:

Flowers in the Foyer by DW Milton
Storage by Ollie Fox
Bye, Baby Bunting by Leslie Warren

Withered Bindings by Michael Fassbender
Dinner Guests by Emerian Rich
A Green Thumb by Daphne Strasert
Turning Pages by Mark Orr

A Fresh Start by D.J. Pitsiladis
The Living Room by Amanda Leslie
Lanai by BF Vega
Cacophony by Judith Pancoast
Nightbears by Loren Rhodes
Beyond the Ensuite by Barend Nieuwstraten III (I remember reading this one and thinking, "What the devil's an ensuite?"  Oh, I was so naive in those days.  But I still don't know)
The Desiccated Heart by Sumiko Saulson
A Study in Terror by Jason Fischer
Come Find Me, Mummy by Rosetta Yorke
Missing by R.L. Merrill

Emz put these out where you can buy the whole collection in audio, and it's now up on Audible HERE.  Just pray the doors don't lock behind you.

Rish Narrates "Restroom Finds" on Tales To Terrify

 Okay, this one has to be the last one.

Once again, I lent my voice to the Tales To Terrify podcast to narrate a story, this one Calvin Demmer's "Restroom Finds."

This is a very short story, one that shows just a glimpse of a post- or mid-apocalyptic world where the government has given way to martial law, and it's every man (or woman, or child) for themselves.  The narrator drives along, picking up supplies when he can, and stopping at a truck stop restroom, hoping to scavenge something useful . . . you never know.

No, Calvin, you don't.

This story is almost ridiculously short, but that doesn't automatically make it not worth your time.  After all, I'm the narrator, so . . .

Check it out HERE.

Jonathan Wilson Brings My "Ash Tree" Reading To Life

Well, a half-life anyway.

One of my favorite writers to run stories by on the Podcast That Dares is MR James, and my favorite of those stories (so far) has been "The Ash Tree."  It's a really creepy tale about skulking creatures in the night, and the ending does not disappoint.  And what Jonathan has done is extremely simple, yet it totally works--he's got an image of a foggy manor house at night that is subtly animated, and that's the only visual.* 

It's something I wish I were capable, not only due to its effect, but its simplicity.  Anyway, give it another listen RIGHT HERE.  Thanks, Jonathan!

*Other than burned-in subtitles, unfortunately.

I Narrate "The Oval Portrait" On Journey Into...

Hey there, sir, would you take a look at that portrait there?  What shape would you say it is?  Not a circle, exactly, but definitely not a square or rectangle.  Hmmm.

The other day, I sat down to record some audio (I finished another reading of a Lara & The Witch story), when I got a text from Marshal Latham, reminding me it was Poe Month on his podcast.*  He was thinking of running "The Gold Bug" again (Princess Leia forbid), and I told him I could record something.  While I waited for his reply, I did a search for Edgar Allan Poe stories, and found "The Oval Portrait," which I had never read.  It was short, so maybe I could record and edit it in time.

A minute later, I got the message from Marshal, "How about The Oval Portrait?"

Well, it was Karma, I suppose, so I quickly performed the story, got it edited, and sent to Marshal the same day.  Like I said, it's real short.

So, the newest episode of Journey Into... is up and available.  Feel free to check it out HERE, and feel free-er to go HERE and support Marshal's fine podcast on Patreon.  Tell 'em Large Marge sent ya.

*To all who celebrate.

Jonathan Wilson Does What I Fail To Do

I probably mentioned Jonathan Wilson's YouTube channel on here before, but let me mention it again.  He's fallen in love with the art of storytelling (including writing and narration) and has started putting out his work on YouTube.*

He's put together this channel, with the intention of sharing more of his narrations, and asked me if I wanted any of my narrations on there as well.  Now, I have wanted to do this for a decade now, and even tried it a couple of years ago, managing to put a half dozen or so videos on YouTube, despite only being capable of the most rudimentary video-making achievements . . . and then when my P.O.S. computer died, I wasn't even capable of that anymore.

I have, no exaggeration, between two and three hundred audio files that I have made over the years, split fairly evenly between the work of other writers (generally what I put out on The Podcast That Dares Not Speak Its Name) and my own (what I released on the Outcast, and to a lesser extent, on the Dunesteef).  I would love to put out a file or two a month, since YouTube is so visible and so popular, but I simply haven't the time or resources to do it.**  So, the fact that Jonathan is willing and able is a huge boon to me, and I hope many folks discover his work, and along the way, mine as well.

I sent him several of my readings, all but one old public domain ghost stories I had run on The Podcast That Dares.  The other one he deemed not quite ready for Prime Time, and I'll defer to his judgment there. 

Among the first of his released videos is my performance of "The Voice In The Night" by William Hope Hodgeson, and it's essentially the image of a lantern while my audio plays behind it.  But that's just fine, and makes me want to go to the library some Tuesday and do one of my own.  It's an excellent story, so do yourself a favor and listen to it again by clicking HERE.

*If you recall, he experimented with generative AI, making animations or images to go with his work which, creepy though it may be, I was very impressed with.

**There's never enough time in the day, and even when I had a movie-making program available to me, I didn't feel it was worth spending an hour or so to put out one of my readings, or the three or four hours it would take me to put out an actual video.  Sadly, I did sit down and record a couple that never saw the light of day, and that's an even bigger waste of time, wouldn't you agree?

Rish Performs "The Cat That Went To Uranus" on Cast of Wonders

So, another of my readings is available for you to listen to.  This one is "The Cat That Went To Uranus," by Dan Peacock.  Yeah, the story with THAT word in it.  It's over at the Cast of Wonders podcast now.

Two astronauts, on their way to investigate what might be an alien spacecraft near the planet Uranus, discover there's a third passenger on their ship . . . a black cat called Scoopy.

In editing my reading, I questioned the voice I assigned the main character (if it's set today, no way would a NASA mission have a commander with an English accent), but the story's author is OBVIOUSLY not American, by the words, spelling, and phraseology he uses, and things sounded more natural with that accent*, so that's the choice I made.

I did two other voices for the other human characters, as well as meowing for the cat, and my own made-up language for the remaining character.  Feel free to check it out HERE.

*Can you imagine if the American actors in THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING had retained their filthy Yank accents while delivering that odd pseudo-medieval dialogue?

My Voice In Journey Into's "Daydream"

You remember that story I wrote about the man who meets the dog-faced boy at a secret circus? Well, it was one of the finalists of Marshal Latham's diabolical Journey Into Journey contest, and now, if you like, you can check out the other winning story, "Daydream," by R.C. Anderson.

Now, I haven't read the whole story yet, so I can't say how good (or great) it is. But Marshal asked me if I would perform one of the characters, as Bria Burton narrates all the rest.

I voice King Eric, an older man who is dying in a world that he designed. And it was enough of a challenge that I had to try to come up with a voice for this guy, then try to make it consistent when he is emotional, scared, weakening . . . and singing a song. I had the advantage of getting a bit sick and going ahead and recording before I'd recovered 100%. 

Did I succeed? Does it just sound like my regular voice? And more importantly, will you even notice? Find out HERE.

My Voice On "The Wax Shadow" on HorrorAddicts

A lot of the stories Emerian Rich writes for her podcast* have a female main character and female supporting characters. Sometimes, there's a dude who grabs one of the women's butts on the subway or tells her he's gonna kill her daughter if she doesn't give up the briefcase . . . and in those cases, she lately calls me to voice those guys. Everybody else, she voices herself.

But with this new story, "Wax Shadow," it's almost completely the opposite. This tells the tale of Josh Anton, up and coming star of action movies, who is gifted with a wax replica of himself, one that looks remarkably like him. But when Josh spreads himself too thin, the wax version decides to take his place for a little while, to help him get back on his feet.

I voice a whole mess of characters in this one, from Josh and his doppelganger, to his brother, to a talk show host, to a deliveryman, to an Action star from the past that lives down the block (Emerian did change the gender of Josh's assistant to a woman, or it would've been even more).

I tried to make Josh and his brother and his artificial twin sound similar, but slightly different to one another, and that turned out to be a real challenge (sometimes Josh sounds a bit KeanuReevesish, and that wasn't entirely my intention). I'm not sure if it's even apparent in the finished product, but I did try.**

If you've got the time, check it out HERE.

*It's more likely she writes them elsewhere and puts them up on her podcast, since she also publishes collections of them . . . like I oughtta do more of.

**Usually, I can alter the pitch or the accent or the age of the character so they sound distinct, but this one gave me way less wiggle room. By the way, when you were a child, did you have a Wiggle Room? I was always jealous of my friend Steven's Wiggle Room. It seemed so wondrous and freeing and fun. Until they found the bones, that was.

My Voice On Jonathan Wilson's "The Hollows"

Jonathan Wilson is a really good guy, and waaaaaaay more ambitious than I have become.

 He has continued to write short stories and on occasion has me do a voice or two on the full-cast audio versions.  But he has also embraced the demon-fed technology of the day, and creates motion videos for his stories.  It's certainly not what I would do . . . but isn't that the beauty of other people?

Well beauty or not, here's his tale, "The Hollows," in which both Big and I lend our voices (though not our faces this time*) to the experience.  Teen Josh has been forbidden to hang out in the dangerous section of woods near his neighborhood, but his friends manage to get him out there.  Big mistake.

You can check out the video HERE, or, since it's on YouTube, I could just post it below:

*Dang, it is so weird to hear my voice (and Big's) coming out of the mouths of strangers.  But I suppose it's better than--(redacted for being too explicit, and worse, not funny).

My Voice on "Vega" By Jonathan Wilson

Not too long ago, a friend of the Dunesteef, Jonathan Wilson, contacted me, asking if I had any lines in stories for him to voice, since he missed those old days where we would have folks send us lines for characters in full-cast stories.  I don't tend to use any other voices in my stories (though I'm occasionally tempted with female characters), but I told him Big might have a slot or two for him on his show.

Not to be deterred, Jonathan has made his own show, written his own stories, and has been releasing them over on YouTube.  And now the worm has turned, as I'm voicing a couple of characters in Jonathan's story "Vega."  It's about a military listening post that gets a message from outer space, originating in the Vega star system.

I just watched it and . . . holy Aerosmith video-era Alicia Silverstone, he seems to have made some kind of animated motion comic, using uncanny valley A.I. character images that move their mouths when there's dialogue.  It's not like anything I've seen . . . and to my horror, I realized that Specialist Donaldson kind of looks like me, facial hair and everything! 

The future is here, kids. 

Check it out AT THIS LINK, if you dare. 

Learn "What Every Young Ghoul Should Know" on Pseudopod

I've only read a bit of Robert Bloch over the years*, but one of the very FIRST stories I ever recorded, back in 1990 or so, was 1938's "The Beetles" by Bloch, who I only knew as the author of Psycho at the time.**

So, I was thrilled when Shawn Garrett contacted me to record a very short Bloch story, "What Every Young Ghoul Should Know."  It's not really Horror so much as a humorous dig at publishing, originally published in Amateur Correspondent magazine in 1937.

I do wish it had been more substantial (my reading is less than nine minutes long and is followed by a full-length Bloch story called "Black Bargain"), but hey, I'm always pleased/flattered/grateful whenever the 'pod asks me to do another story.

Check it out HERE.

*Heads up, I just finished editing a presentation of a Bloch 1951 story for the next (probably) Podcast That Dares.

**Sadly, that's pretty much all anybody knows today, though it would be great if that were to change.

Do NOT Go There! Wait, Come Back!

Greetings, Tales To Terrify fans!  Another of my performances* is available for your wistening peasure, and this time it's "Don’t Go in the Woods…or Do, See If I Care!" by Patrick Barb.  

That camp has, what's known in the biz, as "a death curse."

If you've ever seen FRIDAY THE 13TH or FT13 2, you'll recognize who this story is from the point-of-view of.  And that makes it quite unique.

Anyway, Barb has crafted a tale that's oh-so familiar, but given it an amusing spin.  You can check it out RIGHT HERE.

Tales To Terrify has employed me to narrate several of their stories over the years.  But have any been as fun as this one?  

*For the record, it's my seventh story for them, the others being:

Eric J. Guignard’s A Case Study in Natural Selection and How It Applies to Love 

Warren Benedetto’s Something’s Wrong with Mom 

Edith Nesbit’s Man-Size in Marble 

Tyler Jones’ Who Built the Moon? 

Carrie Lee South’s Feeding On Ourselves

Emily J. Weisenberger’s The Prairie’s Song 

I suggest you check them all out; the narrator is excellent.

A Johnny Staker Recommendation!

Big and I are back together, doing what we do best, on the newest Anklecast (Episode 65).  Big tells the tale "Servants of the Master," his dip of the toe into the realm of vampire fiction (the Mormon one doesn't count).  

Jerome and Kirk attempt to do battle with an infestation of vampires, but before they do, they get advice from famous YouTuber, Johnny Staker, he who's staked a hundred vampires.  

Afterward, we talk about vampire fiction, clichés, and pet peeves.  Check it out HERE.

Warning: The podcast is something from inside the house.

Rish Narrates "The Prairie's Song" on Tales To Terrify

Once again, the Tales To Terrify podcast has given me a story to perform, and while I appreciate their thinking of me, did you ever see the 1972 classic NIGHT OF THE LEPUS?*  Apropos of nothing, I'm sure.

Anyhoo, "The Prairie's Song" tells the tale of one Leland, who travels across Kansas to homestead a plot of land, which will be legally his if he can manage it for five years.  But as soon as he sees the thick grasses, and hears the whistling of the wind across it, he is unsettled, all alone out there.  But IS he alone?

The story was written by Emily J. Weisenberger and can be found AT THIS LINK.

As I've often observed, every new project offers new challenges, great and small.  This one was the character name Justicia.  Unfortunately, I pronounced it differently practically every single time, giving different sounds to both the J and the U, but never the -cia, which I suppose I never did get right.  But it's not a name I've ever heard before, and my brain kept interpreting it as a Spanish word, so . . . sorry?

*Well I saw it, and it scared the shit out of me.  It scared the shit out of every man in America!

Rish Performs "Like A Moth To A Flame" on Journey Into...

So, I spoke a lot--too much?--about Marshal's demented contest over at the Journey Into... podcast, the Quordle Quell, where I wrote my banjo story* . . . which you, again, may listen to HERE.

But as part of my prison release arrangement for my crimes of finding Selena Gomez attractive when she was a teenager, and finding Hilary Duff attractive in her thirties (my mother still isn't returning my letters), I was charged with narrating the winner of the Quordle Quell, "Like A Moth To A Flame" by Barry "Be Wary" Howarth.

It's the tale of a priest brought in to debunk a medium who may or may not be conning a wealthy widow that her dead husband is contacting her.  Marshal added cool layered music and sound effects, as well as copious amounts of explicit nudity.**  Check it out HERE.

*Someone asked me recently if I really do hate the banjo, since I complain so much about it.  And I'd say, banjos and quordle quells are about neck and neck in my mind.

**Your results may vary.

My Voice on "The Decline of the West" on Journey Into...

Marshal "The Acupuncturist" Latham has finally put out the second-place winner in his (cursed) Quardle Quell story contest.  It's by R.C. Anderson, called "The Decline of the West (And Other Terrorist Photo Galleries)," about a computer programmer who stumbles upon a pattern that might be a far-reaching conspiracy.  

I voice Zoltan, an Eastern European computer hacker, which, yeah, is typecasting.  Also featured are Bria Burton, Josh Roseman* and Marshal himself.

Check it out HERE.

*Not THAT Josh Roseman, though.

My Voice on "Rusty Sue" on The Drabblecast

Lucky me, the great Norm Sherman over at the Drabblecast asked me to voice a character in "Rusty Sue" by Arthur Manners.  It's a Weird Western,* a term I still struggle to accept as valid, and I voice . . . Slim, a twelve foot tall android sheriff.  I get to say "pterodactyl-looking muther-fu**ers," so that's nice.

It amazes me that Norm can continue to do such fine work (and that I haven't listened in so long).  It's a short episode, you can check out at THIS LINK.

*It's a post-apocalyptic Western, with a world of mostly robots, so, hey, we got that to look forward to.