Usually, I'm the most timid, submissive, push-overy, nut-less person you've ever seen. Why, just today, my girlfriend mumbled, "Why do you keep letting those cars go ahead of you? You've been here longer than them. What, him too?" And I didn't know what to say, except, "Honey, you realize I don't have a girlfriend, right?" And she laughed and said, "That's no surprise to me, you pathetic cuck!" then she laughed and burst into flames like the Maleficent Dragon at Disneyland.
But there's one area in which I'm not a cringing, accommodating, cowering buttplug: and that's when I'm narrating audiobooks. While doing "Cormorant," there are parts where characters shout orders in British(ish) accents, and I belt them out so loud, the screen goes absolutely blue with sound (and that's with my notoriously quiet audio). I make no apologies, and only wish I could somehow transfer that uncaring self-righteousness to the rest of my everyday life.
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