February Sweeps - Day 147

I've done no writing today. (I wrote that at ten)

I've still done no writing (and now it's 1:34).  I was doing laundry, which is a bit of a chore for anyone, and the whole time, I was thinking, "When I'm done with this, maybe I'll ____."  In this case, the blank was, insanely, "go for another run."  It SHOULD have been "write."  I honestly don't know what's wrong with me (besides the usual laundry list).

While I was folding clothes and matching socks, I put on YouTube on my phone, and the gorram thing just reset Autoplay again, so I was subjected to whatever it decided it wanted to play next.*  And it decided to start playing Ben Folds songs at random, and before I knew it, I was crying.  Thanks, YouTube (I started to type, "Thanks, Obama," just out of habit there).

I just typed a couple of paragraphs, but that was it.  You know, I did sit-ups three different times throughout the day, but I just cannot be arsed to write anymore today.  I didn't go to the cabin on Wednesday, so I feel I got a lot less writing, reading, and editing done.  I'm pretty sure I'll go again next week (filled up my gas tank today, with that trip in mind), and it would be neat if I grabbed a Post-It note and wrote down five or six things, like reading, writing, sleeping, twerking, sit-ups, and kept track of how many times I did each one while I was there.  Okay, not neat, necessarily, but something to do.

This year has been remarkable.  And I mean that in the most literal way possible--what with the Coronavirus and political unrest, but also with my change in behavior and attempt to change my own mental state.  The year's half over, and I will miss this madness when it's gone (well, not all of it, but you know what I mean).

Sit-ups Today: 111
Sit-ups Total: 3311

Just as the sun was going down, I decided to to do my nightly run--I had energy as I often do on Tuesdays and Fridays--and it took me so long to get started that I almost missed the sunset.  As I ran, I thought, "Man, I ought to go to the storage unit and record a song, before the magic hour is over."  So, I pushed myself to run harder and faster, to get home so I could get in the car and get to the unit and get a song recorded. 

Unfortunately, that also got me insanely sweaty, so I grabbed a clean shirt, and put it on while I drove across to where I do my songs.  It was practically dark by then, but I was determined, trying to comb my hair with my fingers, which was all messed up from changing my shirt in the car, and when I got to the aisle where my unit is . . . there was a black car parked there, right there where I typically record.

I had encountered the owner of this car once before--a decent old guy who just wanted to chat and was curious what I was doing.  I had told him I was doing a song for my mom for Mother's Day (which was a lie, but made true when I went back the next week and actually did one for her--which didn't come out right for some reason), and took off, figuring I had what I needed.  He had been one of those "COVID-19's a leftie conspiracy" folks, and I wasn't eager to hear about it, especially with eight or ten minutes of sunset left.

So, I just drove over to the next aisle, where all the junked cars are, and parked next to one, pulled out my camera, and tried to get it recorded before the light was completely gone.  I did a test shot, and the dart skinny-fat guy with the messed up hair and sweaty face was out of focus.  So, I deleted that, set up the phone again, and did the song as fast as I could. 

I did alright, but messed up the ending of the song and decided I should do it again.  By this point, it was full dark, so I turned on my headlights and did the song a second time, trying as hard as I could to be both good and earnestly heartfelt (which is impossible, unless you're Adele).  It's an emotional song (I chose a Tracy Chapman track I didn't realize I didn't know the words to until today), and I was focusing so hard on getting it done . . .  that I screwed up the ending EXACTLY the same way as the first take.  Sigh.

I looked at the video to make sure it was in focus.  Ugh, the background, with all these wrecked cars on one side and a line of storage units on the other, is uglier than anything I've ever recorded before, but you can still see a tiny bit of magic light on the mountain, and it'll have to do.  The things we do for love.

If I have found the strength to exercise (I did push-ups today too, weird), could I not find the strength to force myself to write a few more words before I go to sleep (it's now 2:21am)?

Words Today: 783 (sorry, I just can't stay awake any longer--it's now 2:49)
Words In June: 26,391

*How does that work?  Is it an algorithm, or does everyone get the same next song/video in the rotation, like a radio station?