Rish does his annual episode about the Lara Demming series, specifically talking about "Bundling Made Easy" and "Here To Help."
Note: Recorded over three sessions in two different months, expect plenty of repetition in this one. Yay!
If you'd like to download the episode, Right-Click HERE.
If you would like to support me on Patreon, click HERE.
If you like piña coladas, click HERE.
Logo by Gino "The Itch and Me" Moretto.
A bit a trivia for you: The only one of my stories that we did on both the Dunesteef and the Rish Outcast was "Know When To Walk Away, Know When To Run."
It's one I've never been thrilled with, because I couldn't make the story itself as scary as it was in my head. But I did rewrite it and try it again, then put it up on Amazon. I worked really hard on the cover art . . . and it was ghastly.
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| (only not in a good way) |
But I went online and spent a full half hour asking for a pair of scaly alien hands/tentacles holding cards at a Blackjack table.
It's available HERE, and I think this cover is better . . . but man oh man, I couldn't get the hands, the cards, and the casino to look right, so I had to compromise (and like the story, it's still not quite there). Ah well.
Another bit a trivia for you: TWISTER was the first movie released on DVD.
I had something of a milestone today, but it wasn't a good milestone, like paying off a house or sleeping with your daughter's friend. No, this was more along the lines of throwing your back out for the first time, or finding a white chest hair, or, I dunno, pooping your pants for pleasure rather than by accident (you know what I'm talking about).
I went to Ross (Dress For Less, doncha know) and bought a few cheap toys, and the guy behind the counter gave me my total . . . then pressed a button and gave me a new total--a lower total. I asked what had happened, and he said, "Tuesdays we give a senior citizen discount." I said, "Uh, what?" but I paid my bill and then looked at the receipt. Sure enough, there was a ten percent Seniors discount.
Won't be long now, kids.
I wrote a story called "Olivia Redux" a year or so back . . . then changed the title to "Olivia Rewinds." I still like both titles, but went with the latter.*
After an argument with her boyfriend, Olivia finds a strange pendant that enables her to go back in time to before it happened. This was inspired by actually finding a strange pendant one morning (and finding it gone in the afternoon), and trying to come up with a story for a "Be Careful What You Wish For" writing contest--one that I ultimately lost, but not with this story.
Maybe the tale isn't great, but the cover art by Big Anklevich sure is.
This guy ought to charge for his services.
If you think the same of me, go HERE to buy the story.
*If I ever write a story called "Octavia Restarts," I'll let you know.
I keep trying to replace covers and publish stories that had been sitting around, waiting their turn.
Next up is "Sleepless Afternoon," the prose version of a sketch I wrote for the show in 2010 or so. It was a semi-amusing* piece where a vampire child awakens his father with fears of daylight, old English professors, the sun, Southern California vampire slayers, etc. I had never released it on its own, so I tried to get an image of a little boy hiding under the covers.
I even went in and put vampire teeth on this one, but felt that less was more (although I did add a bit of orange to his eyes in the other, less angry kid).
But the first image worked a little better . . . though maybe not perfect for the story's tone. Hey, you be the judge. You can find the story HERE, if you like.
It's been a while, but I'm fond enough of that old sketch that I might record a video of myself reading that one and put it on my Patreon too. We'll see--I do hate to edit videos.
Oh, that reminds me, I opened up "Bundling Made Easy" the other day, to add a link to "Here To Help" at the end (Abbie suggested I put a list of the other entries in a series on every one, and I'm going to assume that it has helped me sell copies), and I discovered that I had somehow pasted my About The Author page in the middle of the document. So I removed it, and while I was at it, replaced Chapter 6 with an extended Chapter 6 I had started last year and never included in the final version. I wish there were a way to let anybody who bought a copy simply switch it out Walmart-style for the newer version, but I suppose they could simply let me know and I woul--
What's that? Nobody bought "Bundling Made Easy?" Nobody? So, Big was right? Oh.
Never mind then.
*Your kilometridge may vary.
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| This was my mock-up of what I wanted for a cover, using a free stock photo. |
As I mentioned earlier (although I've been posting these out of order, so maybe I mentioned it later), I've been republishing stories with superior covers this month, and publishing stories that I somehow failed to put out there over the years. And the one I'm plugging today is called "Meet the New Clerk, Same As The Old Clerk." It's a story in the Dead & Breakfast series, and deals with Meeshelle Lovett, a one-time employee of the Noble Oaks Bed & Breakfast, who quit working there, and is now coming back.
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| And this was Big's improvement on it. |
For a year and a half, maybe two, I was knee-deep in the Dead & Breakfast stories, cranking them out as fast as I could. That time seems behind me, but I'm still fond of the series. I like this particular story because I like Meeshelle, and that she's afraid to come back to the haunted motel, but forces herself to do so anyway.
Check it out HERE, if you like.
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| This was the 2024 version I came up with--which is much closer to what I wanted in my head. |
This week, my buddy Big and I finally got together to talk about cover art--specifically, the bad art I've had on my stories that he's seen fit to improve for me--and we talked so much that we ran out of time and will have to do it again next week. A lot of time, the images I picked were good, but my text looked unprofessional, or worse, like recently-microwaved walrus dung.* Other times, it was just bad, top to bottom.
And while we were looking over old covers, I stumbled upon the image Sonny See created for us back in 2014 for my story "Greetings From The Ninth Sector." That was a story I wrote for a contest where I had to use the words "Squad," "Reports," and "George Lucas" in there somehow.** In it, Corporal Bruce Otterson, onboard the IFS Lucas, sends messages back to his girlfriend Mandy, as their ship enters the mysterious Ninth Sector, which many onboard think is haunted or cursed. As his transmissions continue, Bruce becomes more and more concerned that his shipmates may be right
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| Big added the star field and the text. Not sure why he picked that shade of blue. |
Big said he could make the logo on the image look better than what I had done myself (goes without saying), and to my surprise, I discovered I had NEVER put it out on Amazon.*** So, today I remedied that. The story is available HERE, if you never read the longer version. I plan on publishing other stories in the next couple of weeks, so I'll keep you posted.
I also thought I would sit down one evening this month and video myself performing the story, then make it available on my Patreon. And if people like that, do it again. And again. What do you think?
*Looking forward to the episode yet? I know I am, and I haven't even started editing it.
**I figured I could just go look up the words on the Dunesteef page . . . but the Dunesteef page is long gone. :(
***That's not technically true; it was part of a collection that's no longer available. I really ought to put together five or eight story collections in case somebody somewhere wants to buy them. But I probably won't.
Not for nothing*, but I've got another story out there, if you'd like to read it.
In "The Washer Whispers," Gil Pinto, recently widowed, hears a sound coming from the dishwasher. Sounds a bit like a voice, doesn't it? What is it saying? And is it talking to him?
Check it out HERE.
This is another one of those stories inspired by real life (I came upstairs and heard someone talking low, even though I was sure I was alone, and walked around trying to figure out who left a radio or phone on . . . but it was the gurgling of the new dishwasher, sounding remarkably like a person whispering), but ended up very much different than I intended it (I'm not usually a pantser, rather than a plotter, but this was closer to the former).
I really struggled with the cover art on this one, asking it to make a man with his hand on a dishwasher, or kneeling beside a dishwasher, or squatting in front of a dishwasher.
*Again, I probably would not even care if Big Anklevich weren't doing so well right now with writing and publishing stories. Peer pressure's the worst.
Rish presents Ambrose Bierce's 1890 story "An Occurrence At Owl Creek Bridge." Remember that one?
Note: Over on my Patreon, this was a double-episode, with a second Bierce story, "The Eyes of the Panther."
If you want to download it, just Right-Click HERE.
If you want to support Rish on Patreon, as a sort of last meal before his execution, click HERE.
Logo by Gino "Deterrence At Owl Creek Bridge" Moretto.
So, February came and went, and even with an extra day, I didn't manage to achieve all my goals. One of those was exercising 24 days (which, now that I think about it, allowed me to take Tuesdays off and a single other day the whole month). I did manage 21 days, and did very well at the end of the month (though I still miss most Tuesdays), and I'm happy that I keep it up, but technically, this was one of those months I fell short of my goals.
So, I recently published the text version of "Bundling Made Easy," a novella in the Lara & The Witch series,* but the audio version (of course) takes longer.
But hey, that time is up, because Audible let me know that the recording--narrated by me--is available now at this link. If you recall, it's the story where Lara Demming gets a boyfriend, and at one point, casts a spell so that everyone can be as happy as she is. Unfortunately, I have yet to meet a reader that her spell was successful on.
Even so, both Lara and I would be pleased if you bought a copy. If you don't, the next person will have to buy two. Check it out HERE.
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| Audible insists that you provide square cover art, so Big made me yet another one. |
P.S. Just today, I opened up my file for "When You Need It Most," the book that takes place during her Senior year, and was shocked to discover that it was nearly eighty thousand words. If you want me to get started on that, let me know . . . but it will take a while.
*Because of Amazon's listing practices, it's considered Book 3 in the series, with "Made Just For You," "The People We Touch," and "Here To Help" considered side projects (since they're just short stories--not that they all aren't). Which will maybe confuse people, if I keep the series up, adding Books and Adjacent entries as I write/publish them. If it didn't confuse Stephen King's readers when he published "The Wind Through The Keyhole" (Dark Tower Book 4.5), my dozen readers should be fine.
