Rish Outcast 13: Babysitter of the Month/Sea Monkey Do

So, this is an episode from back in July, before I got so hopelessly behind on my podcasting.  Ah, who am I kidding?  I was behind then, and I was behind the year before that.

But in this episode, which started out as me trying to do a blog post when I was too busy to do a blogpost, I talk a bit about what's going on in my world, and an idea I got for forthcoming episodes. 

Also, I present, "Sea Monkey Do," a little piece briefly summarizing the origin of the worst child scam in modern history (not taking Pokemon cards into account).



Right click HERE to download the episode--select Save Link As, and save the file to your hard drive.

This is, hopefully, only the first in a series of more regular podcasts from yours truly (and Fake Sean Connery, if I can ever get our schedules to synch).

Rish

Rish's voice on Drabblecast

Apparently, on a clear day, you can see all the way to conspiracy. At least, that's what Desmond Warzel would have you believe.

Years ago, I heard this story on Escapepod, and this week, it's appearing in full-cast form on the Drabblecast. It's done as a radio show, using fans' call-ins as almost all of the parts.  Thanks to (the great) Norm Sherman, I am one of the callers.

It's been a little while since I got to be on the Drabblecast, and though I've given up my dream of ever having one of my stories run there, it's very cool to be back, even in a very small part.  I need to stop producing my own show, and start listening to Drabblecast again.

Seriously, kids.  This production (and the story itself) is AWESOME.  I make you this personal guarantee: you will be thoroughly entertained, or I will personally refund your purchase price.  Put that in your iPod

Here's your link: http://www.drabblecast.org/2014/10/05/drabblecast-340-clear-day-can-see-way-conspiracy/

Rish Performs on "Rip" over at Campfire Radio Theater

Just in time for Halloween, Blaine Hicklin and J. Scott Ballentine are presenting "Rip" (which I initially assumed was "R.I.P.") a two-part scary audio drama as part of their Campfire Radio Theater series. In it, a honeymooning couple in London get more than they bargain for when asking for details about the famous Ripper murders.

I voice "Old Jim," an eccentric Englishman in a pub, who has an almost unbelievable amount of information about Jack the Ripper.

This was a really unique experience for me, as I was told to develop a voice for Old Jim's character, which is supposed to falter a time or two, revealing another, more natural way of speaking, when he's not "performing."*

I know a little of the Old Jack mythos, mostly from film and television, but it was neat to be giving a lecture about it, even if I was reading instead of actually leading a tour. Blaine told me that he and his wife did go to Whitechapel on vacation, but he was too timid to do what the main character does and demand the residents tell him about their local history.

As I said, this is the first part of two, with the second episode dropping shortly. Here be yon links: http://campfireradiotheater.podbean.com/e/rip-part-i

http://campfireradiotheater.podbean.com/e/rip-part-ii/

Rish

*This reminds me of some of the work I did with Abbie Hilton's book, "Hunters Unlucky," where there are different species who speak with different accents (and different characters among them), but one or two of those characters will attempt to speak with the accent of the creatures they're interacting with in order to blend in. So, I had to come up with a way of sounding like the same character, even if he was now speaking in a new accent. A challenge I'm not so sure I was up to.

Rish Outcast 12: A Wish Your Butt Makes

So, no story this time, though they are on the way.  Find out what's coming for me, my projects, and the Dunesteef.  I recorded this quickly because it's rare to get me in a positive, goal-oriented mood.

Let's see if I can get it posted as quickly.



Right click HERE to download the episode, select Save Link As, and save the file to your hard drive.

Stay Tuned . . .

The deadline looms on the largest project I've ever taken on.  Because, of course, I assumed October would never come, and because I foolishly thought I could work on other projects too, I've still got around twenty percent left to do.  But that's okay, because I am actually ENJOYING seeing how close to the deadline I can finish this thing, and that entails spending nearly all of my free time working on it. 

Had I dedicated this much attention, sweat, and time focus on the project, say, back in July . . . I would have finished this puppy back in July.

But more on that later.  This is just a quick note to let you know that, as soon as the huge project is done, I can probably get back to publishing my short stories, writing new ones, getting my other (belated) audiobook commitments finished, creating cover art, putting out the Rish Outcast (which has about five episodes in the can and just waiting to be edited), reading through my stack of books, working with Marshal Latham again, typing up notebook stories, and of course, doing Dunesteef episodes.

So, stick around.  October may be an exciting month.

Rish Outfield, Audiobook Boy

P.S. Over at the Drabblecast this week, they're re-running my favorite story Norm's ever done on his show, "The Store of the Worlds" by Robert Sheckley.  Check it out, if you don't remember.

"Birth of a Sidekick" also available on Audible.com

Just a little note to let you know my reading of "Birth of a Sidekick" is up on Audible.com. 

I have been too busy with my other audiobook obligations to get much stuff done for myself this year (I did just finish one book, and am just over halfway through Abbie Hilton's giant tome), but I did have a mad plan of doing my own audiobooks in between doing them for others.  "Birth of a Sidekick" was my first attempt, and Big has suggested that I put three or four recordings together to make something significantly longer, which will justify people using their allotment of credits to buy one.

When I'm at work, I get all these lofty ideas in my head of the collections I'll put out, the stories I'll record, the artwork I'll create, the stuff I will share (both for a fee and for free).  Of course, when I get home, I fall asleep editing a single chapter of an audiobook-in-progress.  Don't ever get old, children.

But if anyone buys "Birth of a Sidekick," and encourages me, that might help me to achieve one or two of the many, many unrealized goals I have in my cramped little head. 

Here be yon link: http://www.audible.com/pd/Teens/Birth-of-a-Sidekick-Audiobook/B00NAC94MU

Rish's voice on Pseudopod

It's been a long time since my voice has been heard on Pseudopod, the famed Horror podcast.   But I recently voiced a small part in a fullcast production of James Triptree Jr's "The Screwfly Solution."

This appeared in the last week or so, but today, I noticed that the movie at the top of my Netflix queue is the Showtime 2007 adaptation of Triptree's story.  I thought, "I wonder if that episode of Pseudopod has aired yet."  Well, it's there, their episode 400, which is quite a milestone.

"Screwfly" is a timelessly disturbing story about a plague of religious mania that causes males to despise females of the species . . . and murder them.  It starts with the remote crazies in far-away places, but soon spreads, infecting all corners of the more and more intolerant globe.

As you can guess, it's not a tale for the Hallmark Channel crowd.

In listening, I was disturbed by the story, and fear I may have been the weak link in this particular production.  I have a very minor role in the thing, but sometimes, that's good enough.  Check it out at: http://pseudopod.org/2014/08/22/pseudopod-400-the-screwfly-solution/ 

If you dare.

Rish Outcast 11: Last Night of Freedom

So, here is another (overdue) episode of the show, one I meant to have drop right at the end of summer.  It includes the short story "Last Night of Freedom," as well as an explanation of its rather-convoluted origins.  Hopefully, you dig it.

If not . . . no refunds.


Right click HERE to download the episode, select Save Link As, and save the file to your hard drive.

"Birth of a Sidekick" available on Amazon

A few years ago, I started reading books in the Western genre, and I thought it would be fun to create a cowboy hero who would go from town to town to right wrongs, bed bad guys, and shoot maidens fair.  I came up with the barest idea for the character, and suddenly thought, "What if he had a kid sidekick, like Batman, Captain America, Green Arrow, Aquaman, the Human Torch, and (once) Indiana Jones?  They could have a series of adventures together, wherein the little boy becomes a man!"  I absolutely LOVE the idea of the child sidekick, and will make no apologies for it.

The story I wrote, "Birth of a Sidekick," was the result.  It's not really the first story in a series (though Big suggested I could write more), and it's not a true Western.  But it's something I wrote that was a bit different from everything else I had written, and I decided to put it out in both text version and audio.

I sat down and recorded the whole thing . . . and then left it there.  It sat for months, gathering virtual dust, and went nowhere, just like everything else I create.

But no, I mustn't think like that.  I must put out my stuff, give people at least the CHANCE to read it (or listen to it, if they prefer).  And so, here it is.

I was lucky enough to get some pretty impressive cover art by David Krummenacher (above), and if I could somehow employ him to do art for every one of my stories, I'd put out . . . well, probably one or two.

Link is here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00MQMX05C at Amazon and http://www.smashwords.com/upload/details/468527 at Smashwords.

It took a couple more weeks, but here's the link to the audio version on Audible: www.audible.com/pd/Teens/Birth-of-a-Sidekick-Audiobook/B00NAC94MU  I performed it myself, and I'd appreciate it if somebody out there buys it.

Rish

R.I.P. Spink and Williams (and Smith)

I was driving today, and the radio played "Your Love" by the Outfield.  It reminded me that I'd never written anything about the passing of John Spinks, who was the guitarist and songwriter of that Eighties band.  Many years ago, I had a roommate who was a huge fan of that rock group, and it must have been a formative influence on me, because, well...

John Spinks died last month (of liver cancer), and went largely unnoticed and unheralded.  The band, despite having several memorable songs that played in my childhood, peaked with their first album in 1985, and it was all downhill from there.  But it would be nice to hear them on the radio again . . . or my computer.

Heck, I think I might do that right now, as background while I type.

After getting home, my nephews were watching ALADDIN, which Disney Channel was apparently marathoning.  That was a second reminder, that I said nothing about the death of Robin Williams.  It was kind of amazing how hard that hit so many different people, and I'm sure the cause of his death greatly influenced that.  That someone could be so manic, boisterous, and funny could also be haunted and miserable enough to take his own life seems like a contradiction . . . or maybe it doesn't.

To be that high, one has to eventually come down, and I can't imagine what it would be like to try to be "on" all the time the way he was.  Williams was--at least when I was in college--the funniest man on the planet.  Watching the guy in interviews or on red carpets (or in his stand-up or on "Comic Relief" specials) was almost exhausting.

Nevertheless, he was able to achieve a very eclectic career.  He was able to balance making family films like JUMANJI and JACK (yeah, I said it), animated fare like ROBOTS and ALADDIN, dramas like DEAD POETS and GOOD WILL HUNTING, broad comedies like GOOD MORNING VIETNAM and DOUBTFIRE, and dark adult stuff like ONE HOUR PHOTO and INSOMNIA.  And he made time for really bad movies like TOYS, R.V., and FATHERS' DAY.  And NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM.  And POPEYE.  But hey, I digress.

In looking over his filmography, I am reminded that I've never seen THE WORLD ACCORDING TO GARP, AWAKENINGS, or MOSCOW ON THE HUDSON.  My friend Jeff asked me which of his movies I watched to honor the man (apparently this was a worldwide observance this past weekend, that I was not aware of), and maybe I can catch one of those.

My father despised Robin Williams, from the 1970's on, and like a lot of things, Child Rish Outfield suspected that if my father vocally hated something, then I ought to give it a look.  Kind of makes me wonder how many Ke$ha albums my own children would own, if I had any.

When I heard of Robin Williams's passing, I immediately thought of the last movie I'd seen him in, WORLD'S GREATEST DAD, where he's a father whose son chokes himself to death with a belt.  Eee.

But after that, I guess I thought of WHAT DREAMS MAY COME.  I had a very profound experience with WDMC, and it's private enough that I hesitate to share it here.  I was in a dark place at the time, and I appreciated that film in a personal way (I also walked out of the theater with my friend, seeing what I thought was an empty soda cup sitting in the snowy parking lot, so I decided to kick it.  To my surprise, it turned out to be completely full of half-frozen Sprite, and both of us were completely drenched in it, which made for an interesting drive home).  Needless to say, Williams had a huge body of work, from "Mork and Mindy" to THE BIRDCAGE, and it is a gargantuan loss to the movies, and the English-speaking world to say goodbye to the man.

So hey, carpe diem . . . if you get a chance.

Rish Outfield

P.S. Also, in preparing this blog post, I just found out that Dick Smith also just died.  Smith is a legend in movie makeup, especially in Horror circles, and is best known for this work on LITTLE BIG MAN, AMADEUS, THE GODFATHER, and of course, THE EXORCIST.  He was a great innovator, introducing the concept of prosthetic pieces and layers, and it's sad that in this digital age, those kinds of wonderful physical transformations just don't happen anymore. 

I do wanna mention, though, that his work in THE HUNGER (with David Bowie) is the best old age makeup I have ever seen in a movie, and is never mentioned by anybody ever.

Mirror Shard Post-mortem

Yeah, well.  My tale is finished, out there for all to see.

Big finished his story ("Doctor Claw") here: http://www.biganklevich.blogspot.com/

Bria Burton finished her story ("Little Angel Helper") here: http://www.briaburton.blogspot.com/

And, to my surprise, Katherine Inskip also wrote a story ("The Catch") here: http://trisigmatic.wordpress.com/

Algar Van Cluth is still struggling with his.


I think I explained (apparently, falsely) how this story came about.  Big and I have both written stories based on the same claw machine premise.  He finished his earlier than I did--which is fine--and is probably on to his next story project now, which is also fine.

What I didn't say was that, about a month back, I went out to eat at a restaurant with my sister, my niece, and my two nephews.  By the doors, they had, ironically enough, one of those machines that smashes pennies into keychains.  No, it was a claw game, with all unironicalness.  And my nephew begged me, my mom, and my sister for quarters so he could play it.  I tried to explain that they eat people's money, and that they look easy but are really hard, and that he'd be throwing it away, and that Jodie Foster doesn't like men at all, but that Tom Cruise and John Travolta do. 

But there was no reasoning with a seven year old, and he insisted that he'd seen a guy win big on there, and he could win just as easily, if someone would just trust him with half a dollar.  I believe my mom and sister both contributed twenty-five cents each, and the boy ran off to waste it on the game . . . and won.

He just won a little rubber ball, which probably only sold for fifty cents in a store, but he sure was proud of proving me wrong.  And of course, by the same time the next day, he had both lost the ball and forgotten it ever happened (until the next time he saw one of those bloody machines).

I believe I originally planned on the brothers coming to the convenience store three times.  The little brother was supposed to win the first time, then the big brother won something small, and on the third day, the big brother was supposed to have tossed away a fortune trying to win something again.  But I lost interest in the story rather quickly, and it ended up being a) just the two visits, and b) plenty long with only that.

The story turned out to be similar--too similar?--to a couple others I've written where someone finds a magical item and becomes fixated on it.  I like that kind of story, and the kind of open ending this one went with.  In a way, though, it was a truer writing exercise than the last one was because "A Lovely Singing Voice" had already been written once, and this tale was wholly written for the blog.

So, look: "MagiClaw" is not going to win any awards.  It was meant to be short and amusing, and I don't know that it achieved either.  But I had a conversation with Big about it afterward, and it's possible I wrung the best story I could out of the premise.  I dunno, maybe somebody like Josh Roseman or Will MacIntosh could create a gem from this particular chunk of gypsum, but there is one moment in my tale that I like quite a bit, so I don't consider it a total loss.

And as far as that goes, I wrote it, I finished the damn thing (which has started to be par for the course on my writing of late), and I shared it with other people.  And that, good sir (and madam), is an actual triumph.

Rish Outfield

P.S. As before, feel free to let me know of any typos or grammar/structure problems, and I'll fix 'em.  But the "irregardess" has to stay, I'm afraid.