Angel Wednesday (September 3rd)

On this particular night, we had a conundrum on our hands. So far, we had been following the advice of some guy on the internet who suggested the order in which "Buffy"s and "Angel"s should be watched, as to maximize the pleasure of the crossover. And we were getting really close to the only crossover left before BTVS ended.

So tyranist and I had to discuss--or argue, if truth be told--how we were to proceed. My thought was because we had, like three episodes of "Angel" before the crossover, and two episodes of "Buffy," that we just alternate, one and one for the next two weeks until we were past the hand-off and could just proceed to the end.

Tyranist decided, though, that we'd just watch all the "Angel"s through the crossover tonight, and do "Buffy"s next week. It didn't end up sucking too hard.

So, of our "Angel" trio, first up was "Cavalry" by Mere Smith, Steven S. DeKnight, and Jeffrey Bell.

So, picking up near where we left off a couple weeks back, Wesley and the others go to the shaman that removed Angel's soul and try to get it back. He claims that the soul is still in the container he put it in, but he doesn't know its location.

Angelus is still locked in the cage downstairs, but evillawyerwoman Lilah Morgan appears and tells Angelus that she'll let him out if she'll partner up with her. She is still on the run from the Black Beast, and hopes that Angelus will take it down for her. Before he can betray and kill her--as he inevitably would have--Gunn discovers her presence and shoots Angelus with a tranquiliser.

Wesley goes after Lilah, and finds she's been living in the sewers. It's hard to see her in such a lowly state, but it sort of makes her more human, and hey, I like vulnerability in a woman.

Lilah has a book with a reference to the Beast in it. Wesley is surprised, because he has the same book, but it makes no such reference. It turns out that Lilah's copy isn't from this dimension, and Wesley realises that all record of the Beast (and all memory of it) were somehow wiped out in this dimension. It's kind of the opposite of the spell that brought Dawn into the world, isn't it? And it explains why Angelus knows something that Angel doesn't: when this forgetting spell was cast, Angelus didn't exist anymore.

Back at the hotel, Angelus gives up a tiny bit of new information: the Black Beast has a master, someone worse and more powerful than it is. It's like that great new saying: Hell has a basement. Later, we see the Beast communing with this master, speaking with someone in another dimension similar to how Vader communicated with the Emperor in TESB.

When Wesley returns, he has Lilah in tow, and gives her sanctuary in the hotel. This rubs the others the wrong way, and I have to wonder if Wesley is still the ranking officer in Angel Investigations now that Angel ain't around (and Wesley isn't in Angel Investigations anymore). He speaks briefly with Fred, and she mentions that she and Gunn aren't seeing each other anymore.

That seems to be an unmistakable opening of a door, but then Angelus mentions that Wesley's loins have been mighty busy with Lilah of late, and Fred scoffs at such an obvious lie, until she realises it's the truth.

Cordelia has a vision, showing them how to return Angel's soul. They have to get some ingredients for the spell, one of which involves digging up some kind of monster zombie that comes back to life and must be killed again by Gunn and Connor.

They set up the spell and perform it. A flash of white light hits Angelus, and knocks him on his tailbone. Then he smirks for just a second, and starts to blink and act confused. Angel has returned. To make sure his soul is really back, Angel sings "Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head," and Lorne is able to see that it's really our guy. But Angel tells them he'll remain in the cage, just in case there's any doubt.

Everybody goes upstairs except Cordelia, who gives him a little peptalk and he agrees to leave the cage. As soon as she's opened it, however, he bonks her on the head and Angelus steps out, happy to be free once again.

Now, I gotta wonder if any of the home viewers were fooled, even for a second. Once you saw that little grin, you knew it hadn't worked, and even with Lorne's somehow mistaken reading of the vampire, Angelus and Angel just have a differing way of carrying themselves and speaking, and it was definitely Angelus in the cage the whole time.

I guess that's a testament to what a good actor ole David Boreanaz is. Coming from a guy who "couldn't quite buy" his evil act back in "Buffy" season two.

Angelus goes out into the streets, but finds vampires everywhere, and absolutely no thrill of the hunt. The others, back at the hotel, discover Cordelia down in the basement, and realise they've been fooled. They go after Angelus, vowing to kill him now rather than bring him back alive.

As soon as they're gone, Angelus pops back to the hotel, eager to chase whoever's there around. And that turns out to be Lilah and Cordelia. Cordy shoots at him with a crossbow, but he catches the bolt and hurls it into her leg. Then he chases Lilah through the hotel until she gives him the slip. Lilah runs into Cordelia, who doesn't seem all that afraid. In fact, she seems somewhat murderous, and stabs Lilah in the neck, leaving her to bleed out on the floor by herself. Cordelia mentions that she let Angelus out on purpose, and Lilah dies. The end.

Well, this had a surprise or two. Tyranist, during the episode, theorised that Cordelia might be the one giving the Beast its orders. I found that unlikely, but was impressed when it was revealed a few minutes later.

Next up was "Salvage," written by David "Next Up, Who's Gay" Fury. It began immediately after, with Angelus finding Lilah in the hall, but seeing she's already dead. The others have figured that Angelus wouldn't want the human buffet the streets of L.A. have become, and have doubled back, and walk in to see him with Lilah. He doesn't try to explain that he didn't do it, but jumps through a window and escapes into the permanent night.

Lorne comes up with a plan to cast the "no demon violence" spell in the hotel that he used to have at his club, and gets to work on that. Wesley takes Lilah's body down to the basement, where he realises that she may rise as a vampire unless he beheads her. She opens her eyes and starts talking to him, but from the way she talks, the things she knows, we can see that it's really just him talking to a Head Lilah Morgan, the way Gaius Baltar talks to a Head Number Six that . . . well, I never really understood how she wasn't really there in some episodes, but could physically manipulate things in other episodes. But that's another series.

She tells him that this is how he ultimately wanted their relationship, and reminds him that that's what he called it that one time. Whether it might have worked out between them or if there was ever any kind of pseudolove there, we'll never know, because he brings down the axe and chops off her head.

Angelus goes to a demon bar (Los Angeles naturally has several), and is greeted as a celebrity there by the vampires and demons. In thanks for the darkness, they help him find out where the Beast is headquartered.

Lorne casts the no-violence spell. Now that we know that Cordelia is not to be trusted, she begins to get stranger and stranger. She sequesters herself inside her room, claiming to be injured from the crossbow bolt, and has Connor waiting on her hand and foot. She communicates with the Beast and gives it the dagger she used to kill Lilah.

Wesley comes upstairs with a renewed sense of purpose. He says he knows where to go and what to do. Cut to: a maximum security womens prison, where our Slayer Number Two Faith is still locked up. A big ole hairy woman tries to kill her, but Faith easily kicks the stuffing out of her, and all the guards are on her side. I guess she's been a model prisoner.

When Wesley arrives to talk to her, she is more than cooperative, and smashes through the safety glass to walk out with her former Watcher. I guess we can see that Faith was in jail of her own free will, sincerely attempting to change her crazy ways, ya hear me?

Wesley explains the situation, but Faith says she absolutely won't kill Angel, since he was the only one who believed in her when she was at her lowest. That doesn't go over well with Connor, though he does find her attractive. She proclaims herself in charge, and they go out to hunt down Angelus (non-lethally). When Connor disobeys her orders and kills the first vampire he sees, she beats him down (rather easily, too) and sends him home.

Well, the word's out on the streets, the devil's in your kiss... Whoops, I was quoting Aerosmith just out of control there. Actually, the word on the streets is that the Slayer is in town. Angelus hears this and immediately calls Buffy's house. When Dawn tells him she'll get Buffy, he hangs up and says, "It's the other one." Cute.

Wesley and Faith discover Angelus in the midst of telling the Beast he won't join it 'cause he doesn't really want a master. Angelus smiles and steps out of the way when Faith readies herself for a fight with somebody . . . who turns out to be the Beast. And for the next few minutes, Faith is totally and completely, utterly and hopelessly beaten down by the Beast. Wow. From her bloodied prone position on the ground, she watches the Beast give a speech about how weak she is compared to it. And then she sees Angelus sneak up behind the Beast and stab it with its own dagger (one made from the stone-like material the Beast was made of). Well, the Beast reacts badly to this, and dies. It releases the energy it took and the sun is restored. Angelus barely escapes as daylight takes over, angry that that part of Angel's happy fantasy turned out to be true.

Everyone in Los Angeles, except the vampires, goths, streakers, demons, gangmembers, taggers, and poor Edgar Winter, rejoices. Connor goes to Cordelia's room to tell her the good news, but she has a bit of good news of her own. She's quite visibly pregnant, and the child is his. Even though they only had sex days ago show-wise, she's all swollen and pregsy, which proves there's something special about this child. But it should remain their little secret, 'cause the others wouldn't understand. The end.

Heck, I've seen every episode of the show and I don't understand. Still, this was good stuff, and dang, was I happy to see Faith again.

Next up was "Release," written by Sarah Fain, Elizabeth Craft, and Steven S. DeKnight. To which, tyranist asked, "Who the hell didn't write this episode." I guess the answer was "That Whedon guy," but hey, I could be wrong there too. For some reason, Andy Hallett (Lorne) is in the opening credits now. I sort of understand why these things are done the way they are, but . . . oh heck, I have no idea why these things are done when and how they are.

So, Wesley takes our gal Faith back to his apartment, and she's bloody, swollen, and pissed off. She takes a shower and we see that most of her anger is directed at herself, and apparently the bathroom wall, 'cause she punches the crap out of it.

Angelus goes to a demon bar (the same one he was in the episode before, I'd guess), and finds that demons are upset about bringing back the sun. He also finds himself being addressed by a disembodied voice--that of the Beast's master, which tells him he's gonna take the Beast's place as the new number two man in town. I'm not sure why he accepts the offer, but I seem to recall threats being involved.*

Angelus goes back to the hotel, startling Fred, who realises later that she could have hurt Angel even though the spell meant he couldn't hurt her, and stealing all her research on the Beast and its master. To our girl's credit, she does grab the tranquiliser gun and fires it at Angelus . . . but ends up hitting Lorne.

Fred beats herself up about this and Gunn tries to comfort her (and get a little), but it seems that time has passed.

Wesley takes Faith to the same demon bar Angelus hung out in earlier, and they go in the back room, where human junkies like to shoot themselves up with supernatural opiates and let vampires feed on them, 'cause it's supposedly a super-powerful high for both the humans and the vampires. One of these junkies remembers Angelus talking to someone who wasn't there, and in between bitch-slaps from Faith and stabwounds from Wesley, she tells them what he was saying.

Faith calls Wesley on this, thinking he might be going too far, and he turns rather nasty, calling her a hypocrite and a murderer and way beyond any moral high ground, even in a room full of televangelists, meter maids, and Republican Senators.

At this point, tyranist paused the DVD (okay, he did it one hell of a lot more than one point, maybe twenty) and announced that he, like I was last season with the Wesley/Baby Connor storyline, was pretty much finished with the show. The last character he liked had now become unlikable.

I'm not sure why he continued to watch it, but he did.

Well, Faith decides to put Wesley through a wall for saying that, and he tells her that the anger she's feeling now is what she'll need to take down Angelus. Her compassion for Angel is a stumbling block, and they need her fierce. I'm not sure if that made tyranist feel better (he has since made no mention of watching "Angel" again), but it worked for me.

Faith and Wesley track Angelus down. It looked like a museum under renovation or a warehouse or something, and Angelus isn't too surprised to find them there. If I were him, I'd be surprised to see Faith walking without crutches, let alone in a battle stance, but maybe she worked on her healing factor in prison all that time.

The battle begins. Wesley is the first casualty, tossed like a boneless doll onto a scaffolding, where he is forced to watch Angelus use his Slayer as a speedbag. Faith gets a couple punches in, but either she's still hurt from her Beast battle, or Angelus is just that much better, 'cause it's really no contest. Finally, he grabs Faith, licks his lips, and Pac Man's her neck for a dose of tasty Slayer blood. The end.

I'm really starting to have issues with this blog program. I got to the end of my post, did the spellcheck, and hit "publish" and then I lost everything I wrote tonight. It's not the first time it's happened, or the second, or the fourth. But I think this is the angriest I've been.

I'm almost tempted not to rewrite any of this, but that would sort of insinuate that it was somehow my fault and not this @#*& program, and I'm not about to let it win. So, here we go again.

Last up was "Orpheus," written by Mere Smith. She's the one I'm never able to remember the background of, so I won't look her up again.

This episode begins immediately after, with Angelus gasping at something Faith has done to him. We flash back to Faith and Wesley in the demon bar, where Faith injected herself with that messed-up drug, planning on having Angelus bite her. He pulls away from her, but it's too late, and he tips over into unconsciousness (or a drug-induced haze). They get both of them back to the hotel, where they stick Angelus back in his cage (chained this time), and stick Faith in bed where, poor thing, she's in a coma again.

Lorne is angry at Wesley for what he did to Faith** and even though he couldn't possibly know her, he sits by her side and holds her hand through the entire ordeal.

About half of this episode is played out in Angel and Faith's heads, where they seem to be sharing a drug-trip or a stroll down memory lane, and I guess they have established that Faith can enter people's dreams, so why not?

We see a couple of previously-unrevealed moments in Angel's life, such as his arrival in America at Ellis Island in the Teens or Twenties. He's lonely and weighed down with guilt over his many acts as a vampire. Angelus looks on with disgust as Angel runs into traffic to save some flapper's little dog in the Twenties, then eggs him on when Angel eyes her bare neck and feels the temptation of blood within himself.

We get a moment where Connor seems to find Faith pretty cool, but Cordelia nips that in the bud right quick.

Fred calls Sunnydale and asks Willow Rosenberg to come over and give Angel his soul back like she did in "Buffy" season two, and I gotta say, the moment she arrives, the show gets classier.

Willow goes up to see Cordelia (who has spent the last couple episodes holed-up in her room), and Cordelia tries to get her close enough so she can kill her with the knife under her pillow. But Willow realises she can cast a spell to shatter the container that holds Angel's soul, no matter where it is, and leaves before Cordelia can make her move.

We see a long-haired Angel in the Seventies walk into a diner and play some Barry Manilow, much to Angelus's irritation. Then a dude comes in and robs the place, shooting the cashier before running off into the night. Angel tries to help the wounded cashier, but when he sees all the blood he's unable to help himself and drinks from him. I think Faith understands Angel's struggles and the mistakes he's made, and can certainly relate.

Angelus explains that, to punish himself, Angel hung out in sewers and ate rats for twenty years after that slip-up, which helps to explain why he was that way in the first flashback we saw of him back in "Becoming Part One."

Cordelia casts a spell to keep Willow from casting hers, and they have a little magical tussle. Connor interrupts Cordelia by going up to check on her, and Willow shatters the jar Angel's soul is in. Then Willow and Fred cast the "Becoming Part Two" spell to stick the soul back inside Angel. It's amazing how long ago it seems Willow did that the first time (five years in real time), even though I haven't been watching all that long.

Well, Cordelia's less than thrilled, and she demands that Connor go down to the basement and stake Angelus before he can get out and harm their baby. He lapdoggishly obeys.

Later we see Angel in an alley, dirty and hunting vermin. When Angelus mocks him, Angel notices and the two of them engage in a SUPERMAN III-esque battle. Angel is able to overcome his evil counterpart and vanquishes Angelus.*** Angel thanks Faith for what she did for him. Then Faith wakes up from their drug-coma.

She goes down to check on Angel and stops Connor from killing his father. She beats the potato salad out of him until Angel wakes up, his old self again. He stops the fight and--I assume--is filled in on everything that happened while he was away.

Faith hears what's going on on UPN and decides to go with Willow to Sunnydale. She says goodbye to the "Angel" gang but refuses to hug anyone. Angel tells her to say goodbye to Buffy, and I just realised that, with her show ending, those two probably won't have any more encounters (let alone "get together" again). It may make me a sappy romantic, and very different from the guy who started this series just 18 months ago, but I have begun to see Buffy and Angel as soulmates and hoping they end up with one another. Weird.

After Faith and Willow are gone, Angel marvels at how complicated things have gotten lately. Then Cordelia walks in, her stomach all swollen and repulsive, and lets them know it's even more complicated that they thought. The end.

I really enjoyed this round of shows, and am a big fan of Faith. I think her fall and redemption has been quite compelling and organic, and I gotta wonder what the "Faith" series might have been like. I also wonder how far along it got before Dushku abandoned it for ABC. Was there a pilot written? Did it have a home at a network? Was it a missed opportunity like the BTVS animated series, or was it just a pipedream like "Ripper" seems to be?

Oh, and I really like Cordelia as a villian.

With her getting rounder and rounder, I didn't know what to think, but her evil was pretty impressive, and I complimented her during the show. She didn't seem to notice, though.

It looks like we might stick with "Buffy" to the end, so it might be a while before we check in with the gang in Los Angeles again. I'm pretty fine with that.

Rish Orpheus Outfield

*Oh, I remember now. She threatened to restore his soul if he didn't cooperate.

**Now might have been a good time for some of that patented Watcher self-righteousness, but Wesley just takes it.

***I get a feeling that it's the last we'll see of him in the series, and that's too bad, but I understand. He's a great villain, but he's also one of those that gets diluted the more often he's used. As a comic book fan, I've seen that happen with far too many of my favourite baddies.

The Terror, The Terror (ugh, I can't believe I went there)

I went camping with the family for the Labor Day weekend, staying in the ever-expanding cabin in the woods. My dad and my uncle have been building it for several years, and it's finally at the stage where it's truly livable and a thing to behold. Oh, and apparently my brother gets it when my father dies, but that's a subject for another post.

Oh, and I took a bunch of pictures. Another post too.

Basically, I just wanted to mention (very briefly), that I don't read a lot anymore. I used to be something of a reader, I guess, and still own many books, but they just sit, gathering dust or water stains.

Now, my evil friend tyranist, now he's a reader. That dude reads--literally--a book a week*, and has a library as vast as Paris Hilton and Courtney Love's collective venereal diseases.

But me, I don't do it like I used to.

It's crazy how life has now shifted into overdrive, and mostly I just watch it spin by, like the merry-go-round Mr. Cooger rode in "Something Wicked This Way Comes."

I don't write as much as I'd like to, I don't blog as much as I'd like to, I don't read as much as I'd like to, I don't watch as much TV as I'd like to**, I don't socialise as much as I'd like to, and mostly I don't live as much as I'd like to.

But anyway, I took The Terror by Dan Simmons with me on the camping trip, and I'm really glad I did. The novel tells the story of an 1847 attempt by two British ships, The Erebus and The Terror, to reach the then-mythical Northwest Passage up near the unexplored Arctic. Both ships end up getting stuck in the ice, and after a particularly cold summer, they are frozen in for another winter, with the very-real possibility that both ships will be lost, and their crews starved, before spring comes again. Oh, and there's something out there, in the blinding snow and ice . . . something hungry.
It's got all the cool period nautical details that I've grown fond of recently, as well as the chilling (no pun intended), unknowable horror I've loved all my life, and I . . . well, really the best thing I can say about it is that while I was reading it yesterday, my mom commented that I must have really been enjoying it, due to the huge goofy grin on my face.

Maybe I should try reading more often.

Still no go on the living, though.

Rish "The Litirate One" Outfield

*And if he travels anywhere, it's easily two books.

**How many people can say that??

Top Five Jonathan Coulton songs

Last Saturday night, I thought it would amuse my niece to play Jonathan Coulton's "Creepy Doll" song for her. It's a morbid little track with a dissonant, music box feel, and lyrics like "There's a creepy doll, that always follows you; It's got a ruined eye, that's always open."
But the song apparently freaked the seven year old out and she insisted on sleeping with the light on. Whoops.

In honor of that, I asked my two friends who I knew were fans of his work, Jeff and Merrill, what their Top Five Favourite Jonathan Coulton Songs would be.

After much consideration, my own list would look something like this:
1. Skullcrusher Mountain
2. Space Doggity
3. Code Monkey
4. First of May
5. I'm Your Moon
This was a real challenge. I was able to come up with ten fairly easily, but it was a real challenge to whittle that down to five. Songs like Still Alive," "The Town Crotch," "Screwed," and even "Re: Your Brains," which introduced me to JoCo ended up off the top.

Tyranist, however, said it was easy to narrow his list down to five. It's taken me three or four days to do it. And even then, I'm thinking my list will change in the next couple of weeks, depending on what lyric I notice or tune I find myself humming or mood I'm in.

Tyranist's list was:
1. Famous Blue Raincoat (I know Leonard Cohen wrote it, and I don't care)
2. Re: Your Brains
3. Code Monkey
4. Creepy Doll
5. Ikea

Merrill's list, however, was a little more up my alley. It was:
1. Code Monkey
2. Skullcrusher Mountain
3. Chiron Beta Prime
4. Re: Your Brains
5. The Presidents
6. I'm Your Moon
7. I Feel Fantastic
8. Mandlebrot Set
9. The Future Soon
10. Creepy Doll
11. Better
12. The Town Crotch
13. Big Bad World One
14. Ikea
15. Kenesaw Mountain Landis (Sorry I just couldn't stop at five...)

Jonathan Coulton's stuff is really, really good, and often knowing the context of a song (or getting the geeky and/or nerdy references) vastly improves the enjoyment of those blissful three and a half minutes.

Rish "Uncle of the Year" Outfield

P.S. What's with all the screaming?

Buffy Wednesday (August 27)

Tyranist and I caught three episodes of BTVS this week. Sadly, it means we are now more than halfway through the last season.

First up was "Potential," by Rebecca Rand Kirshner. I should remember who Kirshner is (she wrote "Tabula Rasa"), but I always forget.

The show started with Buffy and her potential Slayers (including a Chinese one, who only speaks subtitled Mandarin) walking through the cemetery. Spike jumps out and attacks the girls, all part of their training, and Buffy critiques their actions. For now, the First Evil is apparently napping, but it will rear its ugly head(s) again soon, more powerful than ever.

Buffy goes to school, where Amanda, the skinny girl she talked to about beating up bullies in "Help" shows up again.

Willow is told by the English coven we have never seen that another Potential is right there in Sunnydale, previously undetected. Dawn and Andrew are both relegated to standing around while the super-normals train or instruct or cast spells or work out. Willow prepares to cast a spell to locate this Potential, who will be sought out by a glowing ball of light. I'm going to come out now that I am all for glowing balls of light. I don't know, maybe I'll change my mind as I grow older, but for now, they're just cool.

Well, Willow casts the spell, and the ball floats around, then zooms straight for Dawn, who is standing by the door. The ball hits her, and knocks her down, and we realise that Dawn is the other Potential Slayer.

But of course, I mean, hey, why shouldn't she be? When Buffy died, I thought it only natural that Dawn should be the next Slayer, since she's made up of Buffy DNA, right?

Well, Dawn takes the news badly. In order for her to become the next Slayer, Buffy's gotta die, right?* Also, a Slayer tends to have a very short lifespan. After all, Buffy was killed, what, a year after being "chosen?" Dawn goes upstairs, then takes off out the window. Buffy never would've done that at her age.

Dawn finds Amanda from school on the sidewalk, who tells her that she was attacked at the school . . . by what appeared to be a vampire. She says she'd heard rumours that Ms. Summers knew about such things and was looking for her. Dawn says she believes her and asks her to take her to the classroom, where she claims she locked the vampire.

Buffy takes the girls (and Spike) to the local demon bar (I wonder if Sunnydale has more than one), and shows them how to get information from the demons there. Later, they go to a crypt where a vampire is sleeping. Buffy tussles with it, showing the girls how to keep their heads in battle, then she ducks out of the crypt, leaving the girls to fend for themselves.

It's maybe not the best way to teach a lesson, but it gets the point across. And anyway, they kill the vampire without any casualties, so I guess it worked out.

Xander and Willow, back at . . . well, their house, discover that Dawn has snuck out, and Willow casts a locator spell to find her.

Dawn and Amanda go to the school, and find the vampire hiding in wait for them. It chases them around and Dawn does her best to wallop it with a fire extinguisher. They board themselves up a science classroom while the vampire tries to get them.

Even worse, the Bringers (them pesky minions of the First Evil) show up to capture/kill the Potential Slayer. Dawn thinks fast and uses the gas jets to burn them, and sees that they were after Amanda, not her.

Xander and Willow and Buffy and . . . pretty much everyone who's not evil or dead arrive at the school. The vampire attacks again, and Dawn gives the stake she was using to Amanda, telling her that she's the one to kill it. She does, and Buffy takes care of the Bringers.

As they leave, it is revealed that Amanda was at the door when Willow cast her spell, and it went THROUGH Dawn to get to Amanda. Suddenly, Amanda is special, and the other Potentials immediately bond with her. Dawn ends up feeling unspecial and like an outsider again, but quickly volunteers to do some research on the computer. The real Potentials (and Buffy) continue training, leaving her alone.

Then Xander comes by, and tells her he knows how she feels. Ever since "Welcome to the Hellmouth," he's been the normal, ordinary guy, surrounded by Slayers, or smart people, or vampires, or witches, or werewolves, or ex-demons, or whatever Cordelia was, but that he can see that she's special even without powers or a unique heritage.** It's a nice moment between them, and it makes Dawn feel better, and hey, sometimes that's all you need. The end.

I didn't particularly like this episode . . . until the end. The Xander speech was a good one, and Dawn is a sweet character, and that made up for a lot. I think tyranist felt like it was the best scene Xander ever had, and while I can't go that far, it was nice.

Next up was "The Killer In Me," written by Drew Greenberg. It began with Giles taking the Potential girls out into the desert for a vision quest. We never see the girls, though, which I assumed was a cost-cutting measure.*** And something else we never see . . . Giles touching anything. They even explain that someone else has to drive for him because he let his drivers license expire. I believe this was another of those "tyranist pauses the tape" moments.

Kennedy is too sick to go, but Giles and all the girls drive off into the desert. Spike is still chained down in the basement (fairly sure the First Evil is going to take him over again), but it seems he's been having problems with his brain chip: it's been causing him pain when he's, I don't know, sitting on the couch or taking a slash. In other words, it's malfunctioning.
She decides to call Riley, but when she calls the number he gave her, she gets a flower shop answering machine, and leaves a cryptic message (I believe it involved the Army of the Twelve Monkeys and "Merry Christmas") before hanging up. Meanwhile, Spike writhes on the floor.

So, Kennedy wasn't really sick, she just didn't want to go with the squares on their silly vision quest, but preferred to stay and hang with Willow. I should find that irritating as hell, but for some reason, I was cool with it. She tells Willow she needs to take her somewhere and show her something important, and that somewhere turns out to be at the Bronze, and that something turns out to be her patented seduction routine.

She talks to Willow about how she became a lesbian, and at first Willow is very defensive about it, but warms rather quickly. Much as I have to this character. Willow tells Kennedy about Tara and Kennedy tells Willow why she finds her so attractive. A little drunk, they return to their already-shared bedroom, and kiss.

But something strange happens: when they part, it's no longer Willow standing there, but Warren. Kennedy freaks out, Willow sees herself in the mirror and she freaks out, they go downstairs, and everybody else freaks out. Willow/Warren tries to explain what has happened to her, and eventually convinces everyone that she's who she says she is.

Willow thinks--and it makes perfect sense--that this is something she has done to herself, through that magic that has a tendency to go a little screwy. She takes off alone, but Kennedy follows her.

Because Buffy doesn't know what else to do, she and Spike go to where the Initiative headquarters used to be. I thought it was all filled in with concrete, but apparently they just closed the doors and got the hel-ck out of Dodge. It is dark in there, and there are still bodies (of both demons and men) decaying on the floor. But something else lurks there, a demon that didn't die, perhaps, and it leaps upon Buffy when she's distracted by another of Spike's disabling chip-malfunctions.

As soon as Buffy takes the monster out, lights come on around them, and a bunch of Initiative dudes arrive, led by a black guy we've not seen before. He's on orders from Agent Finn to help Buffy out and take care of Spike's chip. And by "take care of," they give her the option of repairing the chip or removing it.

Back at Buffy's house, the phone rings and the Watcher we saw attacked in the episode Giles died in is calling, warning them what he saw. Xander and Anya decide that Giles must be the First Evil, since no one can remember him touching anything (Anya even asks if anyone hugged Giles, not that there's an excuse for not doing it), and they load into the car, taking Dawn and Andrew with them.

Andrew is attempting to endear himself to us by being dorky and shunned by the rest of the group, and I hope it starts working soon, 'cause he strikes me as quite useless and even more annoying. We'll see.

Willow goes to the college campus, where--speaking of useless and annoying--that Wicca group that she used to visit still meets. Well, I guess she met Tara there, so the group wasn't totally useless. None of the girls look familiar to me . . . except one. It's Amy, who has joined the group to get control of her mini-addiction to magic. Or so she claims. She apologises to Willow for what she did, and Willow is a bit distracted by having man parts, but accepts it anyway. Oh, and none of the girls can help Willow, 'cause they're, like, still into incense and black outfits and not shaving their legs.

Willow says something rather un-Willowlike and realises that she not only looks like Warren, but she's becoming like him. She storms off and when Kennedy tries to follow, she puts up a magic shield there. I can't tell you how many times a girl has done that to me (and often, they weren't even witches). So Kennedy goes back to talk to Amy, and finds that not only does Amy know who she is, but she seems a heck of a lot less contrite when she's not in front of her little Wiccy buddies.

In the desert, we find Giles sitting by himself beside a campfire, the Potentials still unseen in their tents or in the wilderness. Xander and Anya and Dawnie and the other guy jump out and tackle Giles. They are all surprised to find that he has physical form, and Giles is surprised they thought he was evil (and that Andrew got grabby with his crotch). Even though it's not explained until the next episode, I'll just say that Giles had heard the Bringer's squeaky shoes and caught the axe when it was swung at his head. He pulled it away and killed the Bringer with it, end of story.

Ho hum.

Wilren goes to the gun shop where he bought the pistol that killed Tara. The gun shop owner recognises "him" and sells him another pistol.

Amy reveals to Kennedy that SHE was the one who caused this to happen to Willow, just to bring her down a peg or three. She cast a spell that would turn Willow into what she most feared, and is quite proud of how it worked out. Her reasons are a) she's a really horrible person, b) it's not fair that Willow gets to be loved after all that she's done, and c) she's a really horrible person. To prove her sincerity, she magically transports Kennedy to Buffy's backyard, just as Wilren comes around the corner, saying the same thing Warren did when he shot Buffy (and Tara).

Kennedy is able to talk Wilren out of shooting her, and Willow cries, realising that when she kissed Kennedy, she finally and truly let Tara be dead in her heart. It's odd to see Warren cry like that, and I gotta admit they did a good job in making the actors behave believably.

Kennedy theorises that because it works in the fairy tales, she can break the spell the same way here. She kisses Wilren . . . who becomes Willow again. And it's funny, I'm perfectly fine with that. The end.

I might ought to talk about how much I didn't want Kennedy to show up on the show, how bothered I was that they would give Willow another love interest so soon, and what a stupid first name Kennedy is (for a boy or a girl), but I'm running low on time, so I'll just leave it for later. Or never.

The third episode we watched was called "First Date," written by Jane Espenson.

After explaining how he didn't die when we saw him die, Giles finds out that Buffy has had Spike's brain-chip removed. He doesn't think that was a wise decision, but Buffy explains that Spike has a soul now, and more importantly, he was able to kill people just fine under the First Evil's influence even with a chip. I guess Giles doesn't really have a say in anything now that he has become Mr. So Timid And Adviceless That We Thought He Was Dead.

And . . .

Basically, this show was about a couple of first dates. Xander meets this Ashanti-looking chick in a hardware store and they seem to hit it off enough that he asks her to dinner and she accepts.

Anya is not at all pleased with this turn of events and would've much preferred that Xander commit seppuku or join a monastery,
and I gotta wonder if maybe there isn't still some potential for a semi-happy ending between those two.

Also, Buffy starts to believe that Principal Wood is up to no good, and goes snooping about his office. When caught, he asks her out to dinner too. She accepts, but doesn't know if she's interested in him or suspicious of him. Spike does the complete opposite of Anya, and tells her to go out and have a nice date with the man. It's weird how all over the board Spike has been this season.

While they're gone, Jonathan appears in front of Andrew, obviously the First Evil again, and tells him it's not too late to kill all the Potentials and get to live forever in peace and happiness (or whatever their deal was when the First was Warren).

"Jonathan" tells Andrew where the gun Willow bought last episode is, and it appears that Andrew's going along with it for about three seconds, before he begins to ask the First if it has any weaknesses he should be aware of. It would seem that Andrew told Willow what was going on, and she put a wire on him, so they could find out what it is planning. The only thing that we learn before it disappears is that it's not time for Spike to play his part yet.

Principal Wood (who I think I'll just call "Wood" from now on) takes Buffy to this hole-in-the-wall restaurant that just happens to go through one of the thousands of dark alleys crawling with vampires that Sunnydale boasts (honest, I think it's on their tourism brochures). The vampires jump out, and while Buffy takes them on, so does Wood, managing to dust one or two.

It turns out that he's a rogue demon hunter, like our man Wesley was, and has been fighting them his whole life, like your man Gunn was. His mother was a Slayer, who was killed by a vampire when he was just a boy, and he was raised by her Watcher. I think this took tyranist completely by surprise, but I think I heard someone mention that the disco Slayer Spike killed in the subway had a son that showed up on the series later, so I sort of knew. I think this makes Buffy more interested in Wood romantically, and probably opens up her world a little knowing that there have been Slayers who had children.

Cut to: Xander's date, also in a restaurant. This Ashanti-looking girl really seems to be into him, and he can't believe it, since every chick to ever show interest in Xander has either been a demon, an ex-demon, or worse, Cordelia Chase.

Sadly (and it's not sad at all, but pretty darn funny), the Ashanti-looking girl also turns out to be a demon, that takes Xander down to the seal under the high school, ties him up, and cuts into him with a knife, hoping to open it up again. Poor guy.

Xander did manage to send Willow a text message when the date started to go south, and she interprets it that his companion is probably a demon. Spike goes to the restaurant to get Buffy, and meets Principal Wood there. They are introduced, but Buffy doesn't tell Wood Spike is a vampire, and sure as hell doesn't tell Wood which vampire Spike is. Though it's possible she doesn't know. I mean, there's probably a new Slayer called more often than the Olympics.

They drive to the school and rescue Xander, killing Ashanti good and proper, and revealing Spike to be a vampire. Wood doesn't understand why Buffy would allow him to live, and is uncomfortable to see they have some kind of "thing" between them.**** Principal Wood goes home, and the First Evil appears to him in the form of his dead mother (it may be at this moment that the home viewers first realise which Slayer his mother was, and that we've seen her before*****). It tells him that he just met her killer that night, and hopes he is man enough to do something about it. The end.

I still feel like these episodes are moving rather slowly, but I am still enjoying the ride. To the complaints that this seventh season has too many characters, I may have to agree on that one, but I'm not really complaining. To have many, many regular characters is to create something intricate and special, but more importantly, leaves it open to kill a few of them off. Which, knowing Joss Whedon as well as I do, I'm sure will happen anytime soon.

Rish Sebastian Outfield

*At this point, tyranist insisted that Faith has to die, not Buffy, for the next Slayer to be called. While the show has never said anything to support that statement, he does know what's coming at the end and I don't so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt.

**Of course, Dawn has only existed as something other than a ball of light for two years, but I'm glad he didn't mention that small detail.

***Turns out I was right. Hoorah for me.

****Notice I didn't say "thang" between them? I think I'm growing as a person.

*****Although to be absolutely fair . . . she ain't the same actress. I checked.

Happy Birthday, Mr. Connery

Today is Sir Sean Connery's birthday. Seventy-eight bloody years old.I am reminded of a game my buddy Matthew and I played once, called Lesser of Two Evils.* It was a sick trade-off of moral conundrums and sadistic choices, of an increasingly difficult and twisted scale. We came up with twisted, funny, and/or titillating scenarios and the other had to choose what he would do, all involving the people we knew from work. I never played "doctor" with Karen Jensen down the street, but it's possibly the only game I would have enjoyed more.

On my turn, I asked Matthew that at our upcoming office Christmas party, Nance, the resident sleazeball/ladies man was going to have his way with one of Matthew's friends, Kathy Frazier. But before it happens, she asks Matthew his advice. If he tells her not to do it, Sean Connery will die that very night. Of course, if he says nothing, then Nance will do what he does to all women, leaving them a hollow, sticky shell of their former selves.

Matthew thought about it for a minute, then said, "Look, I'll tell you the truth: I like Kathy Frazier . . . but I LOVE Sean Connery. So, no."

I think, Doc, that says it all.

So, in honour of Sir Sean, I asked around for the Top Five Sean Connery flicks.

My picks would be:
1. INDIANA JONES III
2. UNTOUCHABLES
3. ROBIN HOOD: PRINCE O' THIEVES (should this count?)
4. YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE
5. DARBY O'GILL AND THE LITTLE PEOPLE

Hey, it's a damn fine movie. But I do have to say that Sir Sean has made so many truly terrible films that you could easily make a Bottom Five list and have some left over to spare (ZARDOZ, anyone?).

Tyranist was the first to respond. With his list, he just took the easy way out.

1. You Only Live Twice
2. Dr No
3. Goldfinger
4. Diamonds Are Forever/From Russia with Love I (tie)
5. Thunderball/Never Say Never Again (tie)


Lawyerboy Ian gave me this (mentioning that it was really tough):
1. Untouchables
2. Goldfinger
3. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
4. Dr. No
5. The Rock

Evil Cousin Ryan sent me this list:
1. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
2. You Only Live Twice
3. Diamonds are Forever
4. The Avengers
5. The Rock


My buddy Rhett also sent me his list. His number one was no surprise, considering he's the only person I know who named one of their children Kurgen.
1. Highlander
2. Medicine Man
3. The Hunt for Red October
4. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
5. Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

That makes me wonder why I didn't consider HIGHLANDER on mine.

Prison Guard Johnny responded (for a change), sending me:
1. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
2. The Rock
3. From Russia with Love
4. The Hunt for Red October
5. Time Bandits
Merrill sent me his list, along with a commentary. He explained that, while he loves Sean Connery, he doesn't love a lot of his pictures. And he also reminded me of the ENTRAPMENT moment with Catherine Zeta-Jones and the laser beam that made me wonder why I don't own that film.

1. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
2. Dragonheart
3. Entrapment
4. Time Bandits
5. Darby O'Gill and the Little People

I expected a couple more responses, but they never came. That puts our winners as:
1. INDY III
2. YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE
3. UNTOUCHABLES
4. GOLDFINGER
5. ZARDOZ
So, here's to you, Sean, and may you have many, many more birthdays. You're the man now, dog.

Rish Outfield Connery

*Just between you and me, we played it more than once. Man, I miss that guy.

Somewhat Disturbing Thing of the Week

At Comic-Con, Merrill stood in line for the "Heroes" show (which we ultimately missed out on), and someone came up to him offering a mask from the movie THE STRANGERS. Merrill did what he did the entire weekend, and asked for three, since he has three children.

When he showed me this I told him, "Just wait, dude, you're going to come downstairs one morning to find your children in the kitchen with the masks on their heads and knives in their hands." He laughed, and told me I was a buttplug, and we went on our merry way.

But a few days ago, Merrill sent me this photo, and I thought it only right to share it with you.

Angel Wednesday (August 20)

So, we actually got together and watched some Whedonverse this Wednes--Whedonverse Wednesday, I like the sound of that.

First up was "Angel" episode "Long Day's Journey." Heck, they're all "Angel" episodes. This one was written by Mere Smith, and before the show started, tyranist and I talked about what happened in the last episode. Basically, we couldn't really remember where we stood, story-wise. I shouldn't have an excuse, since I just blogged about them not too long ago, but it had just been too long in between episodes.

When we felt caught up, we started things going. Basically, the last time we met our intrepid heroes, there was a Black Beast roaming around, and Angel revealed that he knew Cordelia bumped uglies with Connor. This one takes place not long after, with Angel cooped up in his room, growling at Lorne when he tries to talk to him about it.

Electric Gwen, the slutty thief from "Ground State," who has a shocking touch shows up again. She's being hired by a man who needs her to steal protective amulets. Well, he REALLY needs these amulets, 'cause the Black Beast shows up and rips the man open, taking something from his chest amid a lot of white light.

Wesley has done some research and tells us that the little girl at Wolfram & Hart's was their only way of communicating with the "Senior Partners," so they're effectively nullified as a threat. Also, the little girl was one of five totems called the Ra-Tet.

Lorne finds out another of the totems was just killed, and Gwen shows up to tell them what she knows. Cordelia comes over too, but things are strained between her and Angel. Gwen's guy was another Ra-Tetter, so they join forces.

They find out where one more of them is, and go to the cave where he hangs out. Too late, the Beast has been there too. Luckily for us bloggers, the fifth Ra-tet guy shows up in the cave and explains everything for us: the Black Beast wants to use the five of them to blacken out the sun, so vampires and monsters and Billy Corgan can hang out and party all day long. This guy, Manny, has the last piece necessary for the Beast to accomplish this, and asks for their help.

Instead of going to the hotel, they go to Gwen's hideout, which is an awesome apartment hidden inside a rundown empty building. The apartment has a ultra-secure room to use in a panic or emergency, like that Jodie Foster movie I forget the name of, and they stick Manny in there.

Everybody pairs off for guard duty. Gwen is sorry for killing (then unkilling) Gunn, and Cordelia and Angel bicker a bit, each drinking something, then fall asleep. Obviously they were drugged, 'cause when everybody realises it, Manny has been turned into beef chuck.

They argue for a minute about whose fault it was, then play the security video footage . . . which has been erased.

Turns out the Black Beast has to complete a ritual using the pieces he claimed from each of the dead totems, so there's still chance to save our sunlight. Fred comes up with the idea to open up a portal to get rid of the Beast, and she and Wesley work together to plan for this.

Cordelia has a vision in which the Beast is talking to someone, standing around corpses dressed like it's centuries ago. She feels she knows the person the Beast was chatting with, so pretty much everyone is now convinced that Connor is no good.

Tyranist's been saying that for a hell of a long time, but I do try to block it out.

Well, as if backing up the theory, the Black Beast shows up at Connor's warehouse, and smashes him to the ground. Angel and company arrive, and run upstairs to prevent it from doing its ritual. Fred and Wesley open the portal while Angel and Gunn push the Beast through. It disappears, but dammit, like two seconds later it shows up again, and finishes what it started.

Outside, the sun goes all eclipsey, and Edgar Winter can finally enjoy a nice afternoon on the town.

The Beast turns to Angel and asks him to join it. Angel refuses and the Beast leaves them alone. Cordelia realises that the person in her vision was Angelus.

Angel has no memory of the experience with the Beast, and I don't really get that, since part of his curse was to remember fully what he did when he was Angelus.

Of course, that's actually about a thousand years ago, Angel-wise, and he's lost and gained his soul a couple times since then, so I'm willing to accept it . . . barely.

Wesley realises that the Black Beast probably has some kind of power over Angel, and it was him who killed Manny and got the last totem piece and canceled "Firefly," without remembering that he did it. He suggests that Angelus might know about the Beast's history and weaknesses, so it's not Angel that they need, but his dark, evil self. The end.

This was yet another unsatisfying episode, but the show has become very very serialised by this point, so we're not gonna get much satisfaction for a while. That's fine, since I was happy to watch another episode or two immediately after.

Next up was "Awakening," written by David Fury and Steven S. DeKnight.

People are going crazy in light of--or rather, in dark of--the blackening of the sun. Vampires are diggin' it, though,

Both Wesley and Gwen have taken off, and Angel sings to Lorne to see why he can't remember what Angelus did.

Lorne thinks it's a memory Angelus has somehow buried (which makes not a lick of sense to me, but ah well), and Angel severely doesn't want Angelus to return. Connor is happy to have a new reason to hate Angel, and yells at everyone else for thinking the Beast was his fault. Tyranist pauses the DVD to call Connor something called a schmear.

Wesley tracks down a shaman and forces him to help him take Angel's soul away. He takes the shaman to the hotel, and tries to convince Angel that this is the way to go. Angel refuses, reminding him that Wesley has never faced Angelus before, and that Angelus is actually smarter than he is, since he'll think of things--and actually do them--that Angel would never even imagine.

Cordelia goes in to talk to Angel, mentioning that soon the plants will all die (I don't know why I remembered that detail, but I just had to share it). She tells him she agrees with him, having been the only one of the group who has actually met Angelus, and tells him they'll find another way to bring back the sun and stop the Beast.

Well, I don't know if that was her intention, but somehow, this convinces Angel to go ahead with the ritual. He has the guys build him a big steel cage in the basement, and gets in it. There's a red line drawn on the ground around the bars, and no one is to cross that safety zone.

Before the ritual is performed, he speaks to Connor alone. He tells the boy that no matter what he says or does as Angelus, that that is not his father. He is, and he loves him. Connor pauses, seemingly touched by this statement, then tells Angel he'll be the first to kill Angelus if he steps out of line.

Tyranist again pauses the DVD. Any idea what a "fucktard" is?

The shaman has a glass bottle Angel's soul will go into, and gets in the cage with him. He then begins the ritual.* A second later, he stops, pulls out a knife, and tries to kill him. Angel stops the shaman, who proclaims that he is a servant of The Beast and would never help them. In fact, he uses his knife to kill himself, ha ha.

Wesley apologises for bringing the shaman there, and Angel comments that that's the first time he's ever heard Wesley apologise. I don't know if that's the case, but they seem closer because of it.

They discover the shaman has writing all over his body (tattooed?) that gives them information about The Beast, and a weapon that can destroy it. Cordelia gets a vision about it--a sword--and knows where it's being kept. Turns out there's a cave underneath Los Angeles that can lead them to the weapon (it's not quite as lame as it sounds--the cave is heavily booby-trapped, and the sword isn't actually hidden there, but is accessible via a mystic doorway). Angel, Cordelia, Wesley, and Connor go there, and manage to make it through the Indy Jonesy traps and puzzles, but only by working together.

Angel reaches his destination and reaches into something called a hub to remove the sword. That too is booby trapped, and Cordelia is nearly killed in the process. Angel rescues her and they have a tender moment where they hug and she apologises for boning Connor and he says he doesn't care what they've done in the past and they proclaim their love for one another and swap spit. And nobody in Vegas or Atlantic City would take odds on Connor standing there to witness this . . . it was that much of a foregone conclusion.

Well, Connor takes off in a huff and Angel goes after him, and the boy is nearly killed by traps, but still pauses to fight with his father, before making it out alive.

When Angel and company get back to the hotel, Fred tells them her research has shown that the Black Beast can be killed by the sword, and that will release the energies it's using to cloud the sun. It's dangerous, but Angel calls it a plan, and before he and Cordy can kiss again, the Beast shows up there, eager for a fight.

The Beast is really tough, and manages to grab the sword and break it in two. When it moves to kill Angel, Connor shows up and also starts fighting it. Distracted, the Beast turns on the boy, giving Angel the opening he needs to take the broken sword and stab the Beast right through the noggin with it. The Beast dies, rather spectacularly, and the sun comes out again.

Connor admits that Cordelia loves his father instead of him, and grudgingly congratulates Angel on his victory. Everybody but him go outside to enjoy the returned sunlight. The Cordelia comes back, and Barry White must be playing somewhere, because talk turns to kissing and kissing turns to all sorts of doin' it.

Tyranist and I are wondering what Angel may have forgotten here, but it's already too late. He gets a happy face, and then he begins to shudder in pain and confusion, as his soul goes off to join those of anyone involved in a reality show.

Suddenly, we're back in the cage under Angel Investigations. The shaman still stands over Angel, and a glowing red light has filled the bottle he provided. Everything we've just seen was all in Angel's head, a roundabout way of naturally losing his soul. Angelus has returned. The end.

This was quite an interesting episode, and while I didn't hate it with the fiery, raisin-smelling passion that tyranist did, I do have to admit that a lot of this show was a pretty big cheat. No, the Beast isn't defeated and no, the sun didn't come back, and no, Connor and his father didn't make nice, and no, Wesley didn't apologize. But dude, I'm so happy to have Angelus back, that I'm not in a complaining mood.

And up next is our SILENCE OF THE LAMBS episode, which I know tyranist didn't like much better, but would absolutely be the show I would want to write if I were on the "Angel" writing staff. And it were five years ago.

That show was called "Soulless," and was written by Sarah Fain and Elizabeth Craft. Hmmm. Also, it was directed by Samwise Gamgee. Hmmm2.

Angelus sits in his cage alone, and upstairs, the group (led by Wesley) puts the globe holding Angel's soul in the Hyperion safe. They exchange warnings, then Wesley goes down to the basement to talk to the vampire.

I really ought to go into detail, 'cause I frickin loved this episode, but I'm too lazy and too far behind. Basically, Angelus knows everything Angel knows about Wesley, and uses it against him, trying to intimidate him, trying to humiliate him.

He mentions what a disappointment Wesley is to his father, and how he must feel knowing that he loves Fred, while she prefers the company of brown, bald men. There are cameras trained on Angelus to monitor him constantly, but it only serves to open up everybody's secrets to those who watch the feed.

Cordelia also speaks with Angelus, and he takes the opportunity to reveal to everyone that not only did she have sex with Connor, but that she was also the closest thing he had to a mother. Angelus also mocks Angel, who had this happy fantasy where everyone worked together and the whole family was reunited, before he achieved that whole happiness thing.

Fred and Gunn go down to feed the vampire, making sure they don't cross the red line, but Fred is unwise enough to push a cart over the line, which Angelus kicks into her, then grabs her when she falls. He could easily have killed her then, but Wesley shoots him with a tranquiliser and he goes down.

In a scene I still don't understand, Fred thanks Wesley for saving her, and they end up kissing. Then Gunn walks in and decides to beat up Wesley (again). They start fighting, and Fred steps between them to stop the fight, and ends up getting one of Gunn's elbows in the face. Believe me, that stops the fight, but you can chalk that little triumph up to Angelus, who grins happily from his cage.

Connor fights vampires outside where they pretty much have free reign now, but when he returns, people look at him funny and I believe the term "mother fucker" is used. Could be wrong, though. He goes in to see Angelus, and I don't know what he expected, but the vampire is happy to see him, proclaiming himself his real father. He rubs it in how Connor's fake father killed himself rather than live with him, and how he killed his real mother coming out, and predictably, Connor lunges toward him to fight him.

But Cordelia stops him and sends him away (to his room with no dinner and no Nintendo). She turns off the camera and tells Angelus she'll give herself to him if he'll help them take down the Beast. Somehow she convinces him she's telling the truth, and she goes upstairs to let them know the vampire is ready to talk.

When Wesley goes down, Angelus tells him that centuries prior, the Black Beast came to him for help, because a trio of sorceresses were after it. Angelus didn't join with the Beast, and it was banished by the three women.

Turns out these women--or was it their descendants?--still live in the area, and Wesley takes Cordelia and Connor to visit them. Unfortunately, they've already been murdered by the Beast, along with their families. Connor takes this hard . . . and I believe tyranist called him a scrotal cyst when he did. Not sure his reasoning there, but hey, he just doesn't like Connor.

Everybody comes back to the hotel, and Cordelia tells Angelus that with the Beast still out there, the deal is off, and she'll turn him back into Angel. He shrugs and tells her he's pretty sure he'll still get to see the end of the world. And it's not just a bluff, either, because when the safe is opened to retrieve Angel's soul, they find it empty. The end.

I really dug this episode. Sure, it was very Hannibal Lecteresque, with the good guys having to visit the bad guy in his cell to ask for advice in stopping another bad guy, and the delight Angelus took in messing with heads. Come to think of it, maybe it was a little too much like SILENCE OF THE LAMBS.

Or maybe MANHUNTER.

Even though we weren't remotely close (it seems) to resolving the Black Beast story arc, I am quite enjoying it. Tyranist seems to feel the opposite, but I am happy to see Angelus continue for another episode (or more). As I may have mentioned it before, after Wesley, he's my favourite character on the show.

But I'm twisted that way.

Rish "The Cannibal" Outfield

*I had to wonder how smart it was to get inside the cage with Angel, knowing what he was about to unleash. But I can barely finish my story about horny teenage bees, let alone write a TV show.

not really even a post

Today, THE DARK KNIGHT pushed past STAR WARS on the all-time box office list. It's now second after TITANIC.

I don't know how I feel about that.

If Lucas would rerelease the Trilogy every few years instead of just put out a different home video version, he wouldn't need to worry about TITANIC, let alone DARK KNIGHT. But ah well.

Rish Outfield

Post-script: I went to a furniture and appliances store for a water filter today, and STAR WARS was playing on one of their display monitors. It was at the scene where Han Solo says, "It's all a lot of simple tricks and nonsense," and I gotta tell you, I've seen STAR WARS more times than you and all of your brothers and sisters put together, and I was tempted to just forget about the filter and sit and watch the movie right there. If it had been the Death Star attack at the end, I know I would've stuck around to watch it. As much as I enjoyed DARK KNIGHT, there is absolutely nothing in cinema like STAR WARS, take that as you will.
Well, I guess there's EMPIRE STRIKES BACK, if you've got to be technical.

Stupid Thing of the Week

My friend Big Anklevich and I have a short fiction podcast, The Dunesteef Audio Fiction Magazine. Every other week, we get together and record an audio version of a short story someone has sent to us. This last week, we thought we'd get ahead by reading three stories, knowing that the audio files take a long time to edit.

We didn't quite manage three, though.

B.A. and I read through a particularly good scary story, "Woman Called Witch," with me voicing the narrator and the titular creepy old lady. B.A. was the voice of three bank robbers, and glanced around like a Catholic schoolgirl with a Ouija board every time he was called upon to swear, but actually did a pretty good job.

We read through the whole thing in fairly record time, finishing the story after just under forty-eight minutes recording. We were going to move on to the next story, but B.A. checked the file and made an unpleasant realisation: he hadn't had the computer recording from the microphones we'd been holding during the reading.

What came out was a tinny, echoey, static-filled mess, causing my friend to curse in a slightly more realistic way when we heard it. We had to start over and do the story from scratch.

On the positive side, it only took us thirty-nine minutes to get through it the second time.

On the negative (besides the obvious), we both agreed that parts of the story had been much better the first time through.

If you can call any version of my old woman voice "better" than anything else.

Rish "Get It Right the Nth Time" Outfield

Buffy Wednesday (August 6th)

Tyranist and I did burn through a few more "Buffy"s the last time I went to his place. With this group, we're a few steps closer to "Buffy" being over forever. I am sad to think about it.

We watched "Sleeper," written by David Fury and Jane Espenson. I may save this for another blog post, but I probably shouldn't, since it picks up right where "Conversations with Dead People" left off.

Spike buries the woman he killed at the end of last episode in a shallow grave, so we can assume that wasn't just a trick or a ghost.

Willow comes home from the library and finds Buffy's living room
completely thrashed. Dawn tells her that she spoke to her mother, but NOT what Joyce told her, and Willow tells her it was a trick, that something similar happened to her, but not to trust it.

We also travel to England, where a man is--ah hell, a Watcher discovers his charge dead, and then is stabbed as well by more of those robe-wearing dudes from earlier in the season.

Buffy goes to talk to Xander about what the Psyche Major vampire told her, and they wonder if Xander's new roommate might be eating people at night. They remind us that Spike still has his chip, in addition to his soul, but wonder about the validity of both.

Spike comes home, but he doesn't seem to have any memory of what he did that night, or of killing Buffy's classmate. Spike goes to his room, which appears to just be a guest room with the windows covered up. Buffy asks Xander to keep an eye on Spike, but when it's time for him to go to work, he calls up Anya to guard him. She is reluctant, but in my estimation, she should be grateful she's even still on the show.

Anya wonders if Spike keeps mementos of his kills like all the serial killers she regularly has tea with, and sneaks into his room to look through his things.

Of course he wakes up, and of course he sleeps naked. She then reminds me why she's still on the show by claiming she wants to have sex with him (again). Spike turns her down (either because of his newfound soul or because he saw through her lie, I don't know which), and goes back to sleep. When he wakes up, he gives her the whole "it's not you it's me," which leads me to believe it was the former. Then he goes out into the night.

Anya calls Buffy and tells her Spike is gone. Buffy follows him down the absolute crowdedest outdoor shopping area in Sunnydale history. Nay, it's the largest gathering we have ever seen on the show, graduation day included, all out for a bit of shopping on a Thursday evening. I have no idea why they would've sprung for so many extras, unless it was a "Be On Buffy" promotion through the fanclub and everyone in that scene was there for free.

I once did that, to be a part of a certain costumed superhero movie, so I'd understand.

So anyway, Spike goes to this Santa Monica Promenade-type place where he picks up on a ready and willing chick, and takes her to a dark alley. Buffy follows. Pardon my French, but the girl is so fucking creepy and darkly forward, that I was absolutely sure she was either a revenant or another vampire.

But I guess not. Mid-kiss, Spike looks up and sees Buffy there, and she encourages him to kill the girl. He does, and I am mighty disturbed.

The fake Buffy in the alley turns into Spike, and I start wondering if Spike never killed anyone, but it was this creature that can look like anyone it wants. Later it is explained, but I was confused for . . . well, pretty much this whole seventh season so far. Spike sometimes seems utterly insane and other times seems quite coherent, so it made perfect sense that one Spike is the First Evil and one Spike is real.

So, the real Buffy apparently only saw Spike go off with the spooky chick, but she confronts him when he gets home, accusing him of killing her and Holden the Psych Major. Spike denies it, saying that yes, he gets together and talks with women, but it's just a poor substitute for who he'd like to be with. This doesn't convince Buffy, so he reminds her that he has a chip in his head, and that since he got a soul, he dwells on the people he killed before, and would never do it again. Buffy is still not convinced, and tells him that Holden told her Spike sired him. Spike suggests that Holden was lying, that he'd remember if he'd tasted human blood, and . . .

Look, poor Spike really doesn't stand a chance in this scene. It's like getting in a conversation with my cousin's man-hating sister. No matter what logic is placed in front of her, she's always going to sweep it away with either a "You have no idea what you're talking about" or a "That is so typical of a guy to say that." The thing is, Buffy would much rather believe Holden or an evil ghost than her ex-lover, and really wants to believe that Spike is killing again.

I don't know why, but it rewatching this scene and the one that followed it, there is a cold determination in her, despite what those around her say, reminding me a bit of Xander's relentless loathing of Angel in the second and third seasons. It ain't pretty, and if I didn't really like David Fury and Jane Espenson's work, I'd say the fault lies in the writing.

Buffy goes home and Willow uses her handy computer to check if blood-drained corpses have been found. They haven't, but there have been ten disappearances of young women recently (what the Sunnydale police department refers to as "your standard week in November").
Spike, meanwhile, gets a flash of memory about the girl he killed in "Conversations with Dead People." He wants to go out on the town, but Xander won't let him. So Spike knocks Xander out, much to the pain in his noggin, and hits the streets. He goes to the Bronze and asks people if they remember the girl. Up in the rafters, he watches people dance to Aimee Mann, and is joined by an attractive lass who hits on him. When he spurns her advances, she reveals herself as a vampire and tells him he turned her into one.

Xander awakens and calls Buffy, telling her Spike is gone. Somehow she knows he went to the Bronze--oh, because for one short season, all Sunnydale had was the Bronze--and goes there. She asks the bouncer at the door if he's seen Spike, and he tells her she ought not to bother with the Billy Idol wannabe, since he's in there every night with a different girl. The bouncer is actually a pretty cool dude, which reminds me that the writers aren't bad at all.

Spike fights the lady vampire, I guess because she wants to kill the people dancing, and eventually he dusts her. Aimee Mann doesn't like vampire towns, but finishes her song. Spike uses a payphone to call someone, which is revealed to be Buffy, but was shot in such a way that we're somewhat doubtful.* He tells her he remembers things and to meet him at a house.

They go in the basement, but Buffy suspects a trap. And I guess we do too. The other Spike is down there, telling Spike that he's going to have to kill Buffy, even though that wasn't next in the order of things to do. Buffy explains that he thinks he killed a bunch of people and buried them here, and then the Other Spike begins to sing an old folk tune. I guess it's Spike's trigger, 'cause he vamps out and attacks Buffy.

All around them, the people Spike killed come out of the ground as vampires, and attack Buffy. She is overpowered, and they hold her for Spike to kill. That's an interesting action, since he doesn't talk to them and none of them (can) talk either. Is it just an instinct to serve their sire rather than feed for themselves? Are they in some kind of thrall of the First Evil too? Can they see the Other Spike?

Regardless, Spike tastes Buffy's blood (she got a cut on her arm), and it reminds him of all he's done in the past episode and snaps him out of it. Buffy pulls away from the new vampires and kills them all.

She turns to Spike, who tells her to stake him for his crimes. Only now does Buffy realise that something has been manipulating Spike the way she and her friends were manipulated, and she has pity on him, taking him back to her place. Her theory is that, whatever evil is in in town, Spike's been around it the most, and may offer useful insights.

Well, Xander and company aren't exactly thrilled with the idea (though Willow doesn't really say much), and I sure miss the good old days of Season Five, when Dawn had some interesting (and sweet) connection with Spike. Too bad that went away, but if I had to write an official reason for the change, I'd say that she's now a lot less naive, and has seen enough nastiness in Spike (and other vampires) to harden her heart toward him.

I do wonder, now that my wondering cap is on, how Dawn took the whole Season 2 Angel/Angelus stuff and if she ever spent any time with him. And if she did, did she know he was a vampire? And how did she find out?

Anyway, the episode ends back in England, where Giles comes to the home of the Watcher who was attacked. He finds the girl dead, and the Watcher near death. "Gather them," the man says, while a black-robed figure sneaks up behind Rupert Giles and swings an axe at the back of his head. The end.

Well, this episode was a long way from satisfying. It wasn't bad, but it brought up questions that weren't answered to my satisfaction (and still haven't been).

I still have a great amount of affection for Spike, and I was pretty moved when I recounted his pleas for Buffy to stake him to my seven year old niece. I am quite a softie, and I can't imagine what my own children would think of me, if they were to exist.

So, next up was "Never Leave Me," written by Drew CLOVERFIELD Goddard. This was the first episode to air in 2003, and would have been blogged a long time ago if somehow blogger didn't have an error and wipe out my entire recap while still claiming to be saving it.

Andrew is talking to the ghost of Warren . . .

We have established that these aren't really the people they appear to be, right? So it's not really Warren or Drusilla or Joyce or Buffy, even though it can sound like them and know things they would know (like lines from THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK)? Okay, just clearing that up.

. . . who is encouraging him to do more evil. "Warren" becomes "Jonathan," and explains that his blood wasn't enough to open the seal under the high school. Andrew doesn't want to kill any more people, and is incapable of killing a piglet, but he offers to go buy some pig's blood at the butcher shop.

Back at home, Buffy ties Spike to a chair. This sort of thing seems to happen to him a lot (the only thing that happens to him more often is torture), and I wonder if there was ever any tying when he and Buffy were together. Spike is a lot more vampirish now that he's tasted human blood (and Buffy's, at that), but Willow volunteers to go to the butcher shop and get him some pig's blood to drink. I think you can see where this is going.

Yes, Andrew and Willow bump into each other at the butcher shop, and he is (understandably) quite afraid of her. She takes him back to Buffy's, where Xander and Anya (happy to have something to do this week), tie him to a chair and play good cop/bad cop to find out what he knows. He's not really forthcoming, and I could've stood to see him smacked around a bit more.

Buffy calls in sick at work, then calls Quentin Travers at the Watcher Academy (or whatever you'd call it) in London. I guess she's trying to get in touch with Giles, and as soon as Travers hangs up, we see that he's in a big room filled with Watchers, and they don't know where Giles is. He tells them to prepare themselves for what's to come, gathering all their forces together . . . and then the building they're all in explodes. Damn faulty wiring.

Buffy and Spike have a conversation while she feeds him the blood, and he tells her what he did to get his soul, and why he did it. He explains that, with a soul, he now knows that she was using him last season, and that she hated herself for it. He hates himself for the things he's done, so they have something in common. Also, who is Andrew?

Spike is much more calm and lucid now, but the second Buffy leaves the room, the Other Spike shows up and taunts him. Buffy hears him singing as she comes back in, but Spike is now vicious and breaks through his bonds. Instead of attacking Buffy, though, he Robocops through the wall and grabs Andrew in the next room, and bites him.

Buffy knocks Spike out, rescuing Andrew, and suspects that the song she overheard is Spike's trigger. Something about fruity oaty bars, I didn't quite catch it all.

Spike is chained up in the basement, and he tries to rouse Buffy into staking him, but she tells him she's not giving up on him yet. It's interesting how many second chances she's given Spike versus how many she gave Angel, but I guess with Angel, it was Twoo Wuv, I don't know.

Buffy's house is attacked by the evil dudes in hoods and robes. We see that they have no eyes, or rather, X's sewn, gouged, or grown there. Willow is knocked out, Xander and Dawn fight a couple of them (yeah, Dawn), and Buffy kills several of the hooded dudes.** I guess the invaders were really after their two allies, because when the smoke clears, they've tried to get to Andrew, who is still tied to a chair, and have succeeded in stealing Spike away.

Buffy has seen these guys before, in the episode "Amends," and explains to the others what the First Evil was/is, and pieces begin making sense to them now.

We see Principal Wood acting strange, disposing of Jonathan's body from the school basement. That's where The First's hooded minions (I think I'll just call 'em "hoodies" from now on) take Spike to the seal when Jonathan died. They cut into his flesh, bleeding him onto the seal. Oh, and the First takes the form of Buffy when it does this, 'cause, it's duller, it'll hurt more.

Spike's blood opens up a gateway, and a white-skinned, bat-like savage vampire comes out. According to The First, this is a "real vampire." According to the end credits, this is "The Ubervamp." Uh oh.

Next episode was "Bring on the Night," written by Marti Noxon and Douglas Petrie. I can't quite imagine what the title refers to, but I like it.

I've made this complaint before--and with only a dozen episodes left to go, I hope I don't have to again--but I really could've done without the "Special Guest Star Anthony Stewart Head as Rupert Giles" at the very start of the episode. I know it's probably contractual and all, but they've stopped doing that shite on "Angel," and they cast it aside in one episode of "Buffy" last season. If there's a surprise appearance by someone in the show, please wait until the end titles to reveal that to us. Okay?

So, the group--which at this stage is Buffy, Xander, Willow, Anya, Dawn, and a still-tied Andrew--discuss The First Evil, not really getting anywhere. Joyce appears before Buffy, telling her she needs her rest, and Buffy awakens, having "dreamt" it.

Down under the high school, Spike is still alive (I guess they've never established what bleeding a vampire out completely will do, but it makes some sense that it's not enough to kill them, as Angel spent literally months without eating and only ended up with a skin condition), and is . . . big surprise here . . . being tortured.

I'm reminded of this Fred Dreyer show in the Eighties called "Hunter." I never watched the show, but my friend Rafael was a big fan of it, and he explained that pretty much every season, Hunter's partner DeeDee would get raped. Seriously, poor Stephanie Kramer had it in her contract or something. And they'd even play off that in the ads: "This week, DeeDee is raped again! Will Hunter go to far in bringing the perpetrator to justice?"

I don't suppose you could get away with a show like that anymore.

Well, maybe on the Lifetime Network. Only DeeDee would get raped every week. The Hunter would be the one that did it.

ANYWAY, the Ubervamp is slavering and bestial, and is apparently the Boogeyman, only for vampires. The First stands by and watches the torture, this time choosing Drusilla's form because . . . well, she used to be on the show. Spike's head is repeatedly dunked in the water, and it's not clear what The First wants from him, except to see him suffer for, what? For not killing Buffy when he had the chance? For not losing his mind completely? For joining the other side? Or maybe there's something about Spike that we don't know yet, some reason he is worth torturing but not killing. Hmmm.

Andrew eventually tells the gang what he knows, and leads Buffy to the place under the high school where he and Jonathan dug up the seal. She and Dawn cover it back up, and run into Principal Wood there, who also has a shovel. They both awkwardly explain why they're there, and I guess it's supposed to be comical, but I still can't tell if Wood is a goodie or a baddie.

They don't run into Spike down there, so I don't know where, exactly, the First Evil is hanging out. To find out, Willow casts a locator spell, but ends up getting possessed instead. In the thirty seconds or so that she's out of control, she attacks Buffy, Xander, and Anya, so when she comes back to herself, she is afraid EvilCassie is right, and she can't use magic anymore.

And then, Giles shows up at Buffy's house, apparently quite alive. With him, he's brought three girls, all would-be Slayers (or Potentials, as tyranist--who has seen the final episode--refers to them).

Nobody hugs Giles (guess they saw the opening credits too), and he explains what he knows: the First Evil has been killing all the potential Slayers and has wiped out the Watchers Council, so that no one will be around to replace Buffy (and Faith) when it's her turn. Almost all the Council's records have been destroyed, so we don't know a great deal about The First. It can only appear as one who's died, and seems to have no weaknesses. And only Buffy has even the slightest chance of leading us to victory because none of our abilities or knowledge is even remotely useful or of help so Buffy needs to carry the weight of the world on her little back, and did I mention that nobody hugged Giles?

The potentials don't seem entirely convinced that they're safe there, but the Summers home does become something of a sorority house now, with the girls hanging out together and chattering, braiding hair and having pillow fights, and one of them thinking Willow is peachy-keen.

Buffy talks to Giles about the dead Christmas trees in "Amends," and the two of them go to where that tree lot above the cave where the First was HQ'ed. Sure enough, they find it, and Buffy falls through some wood planks and finds herself face to face with the Ubervamp. This creature begins to thrash her soundly, but she sees an opening and stakes it in the heart. Nothing happens.

Finally, she makes a retreat, climbing up the hole she fell through. Because it's daytime outside, the Ubervamp cannot pursue, and she escapes (guess that's where Spike's being held). She pulls herself out of the hole without assistance, and they know that when sunset comes, the Ubervamp will come for them.

Oh, Buffy still has to go to work, and is worried and exhausted (her mother shows up again to tell her to take a rest, 'cause she's gonna need it), surely in over her head this time.

The First Evil (in the guise of Drusilla) continues to torment Spike, and assures him that the pain will stop if he joins their side. Surely the First has no use for a plain old vampire when it's got the Ubervamp at its side, right? Maybe Spike has some part to play in all this, for good or ill.

So, nightfall approaches and Buffy and Company prepare for an attack. The Potentials are given weapons, and Andrew--still tied to a chair--asks to be untied and armed as well. Giles says that nobody is going to be able to really help, that it's all up to Buffy (didn't he know a really powerful magical redhead once?), and one of the Potentials can't take the pressure, and flees into the rapidly-darkening street.

Something also tells me she probably wouldn't have been the next up to bat after Faith.

Buffy goes after her, but the Ubervamp finds her first. She lasts about as long as Rish Outfield in the bedroom, and after killing her, the Ubervamp turns to Buffy. Our poor heroine is beaten down like a cross-eyed foster child, and only gets a breather when she knocks a bunch of steel beams onto the creature.

It pops up again like . . . well, you in the bedroom, and commences to thrash her again. Finally it throws her through a wall, then goes back to its home to abuse Spike.

Bruised and battered, Buffy goes home, and everyone around her is even more convinced they won't be able to win. Finally, she stands up and tells them that even though this is the worst baddie they've faced, and she's scared and hurt, she's not quitting. Instead, they're going to rally together and attack the enemy themselves. The end.

An enjoyable episode, really.

I did get the impression, though, that these episodes were padded, and rather slow to give us any real plot development. I remember last season on "Angel" that we got three episodes' worth of story in four episodes, but I don't recall it happening on "Buffy" until now. In both cases, once things get going, they REALLY get going, but it would disappoint if you were watching them week to week and not a great deal happened. On DVD, we can at least take in three or four and see some major story movement, and on that note, I'm sorta happy to see them all these years later instead of "live."

Although I mentioned it several times, I feel I have to mention that tyranist stopped the tape time and again, both of us convinced that Giles is not Giles, but is rather a manifestation of the First Evil. It's one of those things where, once you suspect it, you see it in everything, like gayity or religion. The main problem was probably that we had no explanation of how he survived his murder two episodes ago. That, mixed with the fact that no one hugged or touched him (I found it telling that Buffy had to pull herself out of the hole she fell into, when Giles could easily have given her a hand), and they already established that the First could only impersonate people but had no physical presence.*** Of course Giles wasn't dead--after all, if they killed him the BBC couldn't make the six series of "Ripper" we all know and love--but they sure as hell made it look like he was.

Grrr, argggh, it still bothers me.

And with this episode, the dread Kennedy has reared her ugly head. And you know, it wasn't ugly at all. I not only found her attractive, I had absolutely no problem with her character. If my young, idealistic me could see me now . . . I'm sure I'd have at least one knife wound in me today.

The last episode of our little marathon--for I'll give you a confession that all the "Buffy"s I blogged about in the last post were actually from this night--was called "Showtime," written by David "They Got the Mustard Out" Fury.****

A girl--obviously a Potential--arrives at the bus station and is immediately attacked by one of the First's minions. But Buffy appears to rescue her, killing the shite out of the hooded bad guys. All the Potentials have names, but I don't know if I should bother learning them or not (except for Kennedy, of course).

There is one, Molly, who stands out a bit because of her oddly-round face, strong Southern accent, and the fact that her name is Molly. When I mentioned how disturbed I was by the name Molly (there's a creepy child called that on "Deep Space Nine," and another one on "Heroes"), tyranist told me that he nearly named his daughter that, he was so fond of it.

I'm not sure if his little girl would be grateful or disappointed to hear that. Poor Nigella.

Molly is very negative, and encourages the other girls to share their doubts about Buffy's ability to protect them. All the Potentials are worried and inexperienced, except for Kennedy, and I have to wonder: where are the Potentials like Kendra, who was raised up from toddlerhood to carry a stake, know vampire lore, and wear a chastity belt?

And speaking of Kennedy, she has decided that she will sleep with Willow. And by that, I mean share a room with her.

And by that, I mean become her luvah.

Kennedy is pretty excited about Willow's powers (and by "excited," I mean...), trying to get her to demonstrate them, but Willow is still skittish about using magic.

Oh crap. Hey, I looked up the episode just now, and I was totally wrong. The name of the round-faced girl is Eve, not Molly. Molly, it turns out, is one of the Potentials introduced last episode (and is also in this one). Sorry.

Now, do I go back and change all the references to Molly, including my rant on how unsettled I am by that name? Or do I recognise that, had my recaps not been mysteriously wiped-out, that I likely would have just gone about my day, not knowing I had the names wrong until we watched an episode and Molly was in it?

Kids, Molly is really Eve. From this point on.

Andrew whines--even more than usual--that he's learned his lesson and wants to fight at their side. The gang finally unties Andrew, but threaten him with bodily harm if he betrays them.

The Summers basement is turned into a training room, but Eve questions what the point of any of it is, since they're all gonna die anyway.

Giles knows about an oracle they can go to for information about The First and the Ubervamp. He and and Anya go together to speak to the oracle, which (after a lot of steps to get there), ends up being a big bunch of eyes.

The oracle tells them that The First Evil cannot die, but has recently been given way more freedom than it has in the past. The reason for this was that the line of Slayers was disrupted. Disrupted when Buffy was brought back from the dead? Or when . . . she was brought back from the dead?

I believe it was the latter, as Anya feels that what the First is doing is partly her fault. It's an interesting idea, that's for sure.

Willow gets a call about another Potential who has come to town but not checked in, and Buffy and Xander head to the motel where she was staying. They find her, already dead, and discover that she is Eve, the round-faced drawler.

They head back, and reveal Eve to be The First Evil again, who was hanging out with them to find out their weaknesses and bring everyone down. This seems to have worked, as the girls are even more convinced they're dead meat now. Willow, Buffy, and Xander somehow communicate telepathically that they have a plan, but don't let the girls know about it. The telepathy thing is revealed later, very similar to something Joss did in "Astonishing X-men" which kicked so much ass, there's still a hoofprint on my pantaloons.

Spike is still suffering, and the First dispatches the Ubervamp (which actually has a species name--a Turok-Han--that I'm never going to use) to go kill everybody at the Summers place. The First's minions go along as well, surrounding the house.

Buffy hands out weapons, and Willow psyches herself up to use magic. When the Ubervamp smashes through the door, Willow puts a
bubble around him, and everyone runs out the back door. There's fighting with the minions, and before long, the Ubervamp pushes through Willow's magic shield.

Buffy splits off of everyone else (though I don't believe Giles and Anya are back yet) to lure the Ubervamp away, while Xander takes all the girls to a construction site, where immense lifts are set up, almost like risers for a concert or event. The Potentials (and Dawn and Willow) climb up them, but the Ubervamp didn't go after Buffy, but comes into the site like it's just arrived at a Sunday buffet.

Buffy arrives to fight the Ubervamp, and Xander turns lights on so the girls can see what Buffy is doing. Buffy gets severely thrashed, but she just keeps getting up, again and again, tiring the creature until she grabs a cable, wraps it around the Ubervamp's neck, and beheads it. Dust.

Exhausted, Buffy tells the girls that this is what the war against The First will be like: lots of pain, lots of struggle, but in the end, a triumph. "Thus endeth the lesson," she says, which I associate with THE UNTOUCHABLES, but is probably from some old philosopher, like Plato, or Socrates, or Sun Tzu, or Denise Richards. The Potentials begin to hope once again.

Spike, still tied and bloody, has no hope when he sees Buffy arrive in front of him. Only when she cuts his bonds and helps him up, practically carrying him to safety, does he accept that it's really her, that she came for him. The end.

Originally, I had a rant here about how Spike is no longer my favourite character on the show, but I don't think I'll write it again. It certainly has been old hat seeing Spike get tortured like that. I like that some of it was psychological torture, but for the most part, we've seen it again and again, the beatings and the cuttings, and even the swollen eye. He really is the closest thing we've got to the old-fashioned damsel in distress in these episodes, even being rescued by Buffy at the end. But I was glad to see it happen.

Both "Angel" and "Buffy" are doing lengthy arcs right now with a powerful evil stronger than they've ever faced before. And in both series, I'm wondering where Faith is in all this. I've heard people complain about the Potentials showing up in this season and stealing a lot of thunder, and we'll have to see if that's truly the case. The only thing I do know is that I spend way too much time on these things (especially this one), even though we're waiting twice as long between episodes.

I'll work on that.

The first thing, not the second.

Rish Outfield

*Dude, maybe it was directed badly. I don't recognize the guy's name, but I can't see why we would be mislead as to the phone conversation, and then have Buffy in a totally different location than right outside the Bronze, where she was established as being the last time we saw her. Besides, if the bouncer told her Spike came there every night, why wouldn't she have gone in to look for him?

**I guess we can assume that they're not human, 'cause a) Buffy kills them with no compunctions, and b) how could they see to fight with no eyes?

***Despite throwing poor Dawn around her house in "Conversations with Dead People" and breaking windows and running electronics. Hmmm.

****With this, I announce a moratorium on that little nickname. If I introduce him again, it will be as David "Next Up, Who's Gay?" Fury, from his line in "Doctor Horrible."